In this awesome design of things you actually secure  a B- just for effort and hard work. Where you actually misplaced us ended up being on all the specifics. You know,  people say, details make or break the argument.. And it could not be more correct at this point. Having said that, permit me tell you just what exactly did give good results. Your text can be really persuasive which is probably the reason why I am making an effort in order to comment. I do not make it a regular habit of doing that. Next, although I can notice the jumps in reason you make, I am not really sure of how you seem to connect your ideas that make your conclusion. For the moment I will yield to your point however wish in the future you link your facts better.