I don't know that anything good ever comes from two people in a marriage being apart for an extended period of time.

[caption id="attachment_503" align="alignright" width="300" caption="Missing her"]<a href="http://mikerappaport.net/onevoice/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/Texas-088.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-503" title="Texas 088" src="http://mikerappaport.net/onevoice/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/Texas-088-300x199.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="199" /></a>[/caption]

My first marriage was probably doomed to fail from the start, but when we started having voluntary separations for the convenience of one or the other of us, it certainly accelerated the process.

Since Nicole and I got married in 1992, our only lengthy times apart have been when she is one business trips, and never for longer than 30 days.

Until now. My trip to Texas has been extremely productive in terms of what I have tried to accomplish, and it has been life changing in some respects, but Nicole and I have been apart for nearly eight weeks and I don't think that has been a good thing.

It's my fault, of course. There were changes I needed to make in my life and I was not doing a good job of accomplishing them at home. In fact, I had pretty well fallen apart since my journalism career had ended abruptly in January 2008.

So I came to Texas and things started working. In fact, so many wonderful things have happened here that I will go home a much stronger person and be much more capable of being a good husband and being happy with myself for the years ahead.

But the danger you always face when you separate voluntarily -- no matter what the purpose -- is that the other person might realize exactly how annoying you are and that it isn't as bad without you as they thought it would be.

I always regretted the separations in my first marriage and figured I would learn from them.

It tells me how far I still have to go as a person that I didn't.