<p>Today the <a href="http://www.williamssonoma.com" target="blank">Williams-Sonoma</a> "Summer Preview 2007" came in the mail. I enjoy perusing this catalog to marvel at the plethora of over-priced single-use (or just stupid) items on offer and wonder just who buys this shit.* Here's a list of representative products from today's catalog:</p>
<ul>
<li>Avocado slicer/pitter ($15): "One end of this handy tool deftly pits an avocado, while the opposite end creates uniform slices of its tender flesh." </li>
<li>Pineapple easy slicer ($25): "Cut a pineapple into a stack of rings in seconds.... The tool swiftly cores and slices the fruit, leaving the shell intact."</li>
<li>Breville Ikon panini press ($99.95): "Prepare bistro-style grilled sandwiches in your own kitchen [when a grilled cheese sandwich just won't do].... Variable heat control also makes the press a superb indoor grill for cooking hamburgers, steaks, fish, and vegetables."</li>
<li>Monogrammed carving board ($99): "Equip your favorite chef with our monogrammed carving board, which is handsome enough to double as a presentation piece for serving." [The description notes "a deep perimeter well" that "collects juices"&mdash;what about the deep central monogram well? It seems to me that this would make the board impractical for actual use&mdash;but that's not really the point, is it?]</li>
<li>Monogrammed steak brand ($39.95): "Equipped with this branding iron, your favorite grill chef can put his (or her) personal stamp on steaks and chops [and spouses and children and guests]. The brand has become a Williams-Sonoma customer favorite over the years and makes a unique Father's Day gift. Hand forged in Texas [of course], it comes with a storage rack that mounts on a wall." </li>
</ul>
<p>Unfortunately, my favorite object of ridicule, the asparagus steamer, did not appear in this issue. The monogrammed steak brand may be my new favorite.
<p class="note">*Granted, the catalog does contain items that I covet.</p>
