Yes, exactly! Please, stop feeling guilty for being different/an outsider. This would have been a problem if you were judging the rest based on your understandings. But you are not. You are trying to understand them/us. And you are doing quite well, I have to admit.

The rest turned out to be off-topic:
The reason why I follow your blog is that you say "I like this, but I don't understand that, and I don't like it". But the way you say it always helps me understand what is exactly is that you don't like, why you don't like it, how you would expect it to be. It helps me understand myself, because I also happen to wonder about these things, but being an INsider I cannot evaluate the whole picture.
And you always say it somehow benevolently. Even not patronizingly, which is the case of many of the Americans who happen to teach in Bulgaria, not to mention those are clearly aggressive in their self-assertion.