[caption id="attachment_965" align="alignright" width="225" caption="Cute Garden Figure!"]<img class="size-medium wp-image-965" title="Statue " src="http://www.karolinkabulgaria.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/dsc08312.jpg?w=225" alt="Cute Garden Figure!" width="225" height="300" />[/caption]

I've been thinking about this question for some time now.  I feel like I never know what to do--to hug, to kiss, to hand-shake?

Here in Bulgaria the two (or sometimes three) cheek-kiss is king. I find that my Bulgarian friends always do it when parting and more often than not also cheek-kiss when they meet/greet each other as well.  My American friends are a completely different story.  Some are trying to adapt, some are not and this usually results in a weirdly placed and unexpected kiss or an awkward hello-handshake-wave-high-five of some sort.

Then there are the expats of all stripes who are living here.  I never know what they are going to do to me or how they are going to greet me whether it will be kisses (how many?), hand-shakes or hellos in a number of different languages.  Mostly though, I think it's great fun.

And I can't help but wonder how did we, as Americans, get stuck with the hand-shake? It must have to do with a desire to never, ever intrude in someone's personal space.  But as a result, we have the most impersonal greeting of all.  Sure a hand-shake has it's place in a business meeting but with friends? Really--a hand-shake!?!

On some level it's hard to believe that we've stuck with the friend-hand-shake as long as we have.  Why is this hard to believe? Well for starters there's something so European about friends kissing hello and for a country that loves all things foreign (french fries, Belgian waffles, Italian food, Swiss watches and fake designer bags to name a few) why don't we kiss like Europeans? <!--more-->

I mean we brought tipping back from Europe--after wealthy Americans started going on the "grand tours of Europe"--and that tradition spread like wildfire.  Strangely funny considering that tipping started in Europe as an aristocratic tradition and we don't have an aristocracy in the States.  Now tipping is a way of life, a 15-20% way of life,  even when it doesn't make economic sense for most of us given the original intention of tipping--better service for the next time we frequented a specific restaurant or cafe (thanks for explaining that <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/12/magazine/12tipping-t.html?scp=1&amp;sq=restaurant%20no%20tip%20&amp;st=cse" target="_blank">NYT</a>).

This leads me to the same question: still no kissing? What's wrong with us? Are we really that freaked out about our personal space that it's invasive for another person we know to kiss our cheeks as a friendly greeting?

The great thing about the kiss-greeting is that you can't really do it wrong.  Unlike a weak handshake, a power grip that seems to be breaking bones or the slimy fish grip--much less is likely to go wrong with a hello or goodbye kiss.  Okay sure there's that one person who kisses a little to purposefully but by simply moving your head a little you're free from that as well.  In my book, you are much, much, more committed to a handshake good or bad.

Thus I got a great kick out of this article: <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/12/magazine/12tipping-t.html?scp=1&amp;sq=restaurant%20no%20tip%20&amp;st=cse">For Teenagers, Hello Means 'How About a Hug?'</a> It gets right at the heart of the issue: a hand-shake's not enough.  Parents, teachers and administrators don't get the hug--some may even fear it as inappropriate--but for students it communicates what a hand-shake does not.  The hug is about you and the other person being more than colleagues, more than acquaintances and having this thing that separates you from the world of parents who shake-hands more than they hug or kiss-hello to anyone.

So back to the issue at hand, I am afraid that the hello-kiss may never catch on.  It seems that there may be too much working against it.  That's a shame.  A real shame because I am being won over by the hello bye good-bye kiss.  Of course not that I feel like  I'm getting the hang of this kissing thing I am going to be leaving.  Well, I've got two months left and then I've got to decide whether or not I am bring the kiss back with me--at least it's no worse those Americans who brought the tradition of tipping back with them from Europe.