My students and I had a big debate about babysitting recently.  The they didn't get it.  They were rather shocked by the idea that teenagers would look after little children in States. They kept saying things like: why would you trust a teenager with your child? why would a mom do that? teenagers aren't responsible enough for this. Then they started telling that in Bulgaria grandmothers watch small children.  They are more reliable and trust worthy.  I tried to explain the American mentality behind teenagers babysitting.

I am a long time babysitter.  In the States it's a pretty common thing but by the time I was in high school I had regular families that I babysat for.  I knew who liked what, which songs to sing, how to trick children into bed, which book would put them to sleep and just how to get someone back to sleep if he or she woke up.  In one case after school from 3-6pm four days a week I went to same family's house and did my homework until the toddler woke up from his nap (his mom working at her graphic design and adverting job a few rooms away in the office); I'd get him up, hold him, give him a snack in his high-chair and then we'd play until mom came out.

It's a pretty routine kind of job.  You show up and smile.  You listen to directions--feed them this, put them to bed by x time, they can't go in here, watch out if you play this game it has little pieces and call this number if you have a problem we'll be there.  <!--more-->And in a world before cell phones I said okay but also told who ever I was babysitting for: don't worry my MoM and dAd are home too so if there was a problem I could call them.  Then the parents leave and all hell breaks loose--kids everywhere, begging to do, each and watch things on tv that their parents never let them do and you do your best to manage the chaos. It's for this reason that babysitting isn't for everyone but I like kids and for the most part they like me.  I also liked getting paid to watch little kids.  At between $3 and maybe $5 an hour it didn't add up fast but three or four hours later I'd have between $9 and$20 and that's pretty good when your expenses are more or less limited to movies, cds, make-up, sweeter-than-sweet-coffee at the local hang out and the clothes your parents wont buy you.

So teenagers babysit in the States because they are young and energetic.  We play games, chase children and have fun doing.  Parents talk to parents and girls in the neighborhood are recommended to babysit. It starts out small and then may build to something bigger.  Teenagers are also cheep labor.  We don't demand very much money because we don't really know that we can and for most of us some money is better than nothing.  It's not as if our expenses are very high--so we take what we get and are generally happy with this.

The other piece I think is that in America's history families were bigger and lots of teenagers were looking after their siblings.  Then when families expanded Westward generational family ties changed and the role of older people in society changed as well.  Their value changed.  Youth, energy and vitality were valued over experience, age and wisdom.  Then with the rise of cities the family unit changed again.  A dependence on neighbors increased and I understand that babysitting as we knew developed seriously during the Great Depression as more women began to enter the workforce.

But none of this convinced my students.  They couldn't get over the idea that somehow teenage girls are responsible enough to watch after someone else's children.  I mentioned to the group of four students I was talking to that if I had children, I would trust them to babysit children.  Their eyes got big.  I tried to further my case. I told them that they were well spoken, that they turned in their work on time, that they got to school and class on time and that based on their appearances they seemed to do a good job looking after themselves. And that for these reasons I would be happy to trust my children to their care for a couple of hours.  Didn't fly.  They remained completely unconvinced.

In fact, they stood firm in their belief that grandmothers were the best people to care for babies and children.  It's not often that I come to an impase with my students but when it came to babysitting there was no reaching them.  I didn't expect them to pick up babysitting right then and there--it's simply not part of the culture in Bulgaria but usually these studnets are able to arrive a place of understanding.  In this case, it was no go.  And, they even got me thinking--why did anyone trust me to babysit their children when I was 15, 16 and 17 years old?