This is not the greatest team in the world. This is just a tribute. 

Team Members: 

Renowned Aspen optometrist Dr. Todd Hartman is a pacifist, a collector of stamps honoring deceased lounge singers, and the creator of every hilarious bumper sticker you've ever seen. He is the World's Greatest Grandpa, despite having no children. He can speak to the dead, and routinely offers them fantasy baseball advice. He is best known for emitting a scent that is both irresistible to the ladies and slowly replacing the ozone layer. 

Aspen Daily News journalist and Harvard grad Damien Williamson has a number of outside interests. On the weekends, he is too busy fighting crime to properly care for house plants, so he taught himself to inhale carbon dioxide and exhale oxygen just to help keep things balanced. He memorized Pi to 40,000 digits...over lunch. He routinely completes the New York Times crossword puzzle while heavily intoxicated, only to go back the next morning and do it again using all synonyms. Every year on President's Day he abducts aliens, though nobody believes them when they tell their stories. 

When he's not implementing creative tax solutions as a CPA with WithumSmith+Brown, Team Captain Tony Nitti dabbles in numerous pursuits. He has won every chili cook-off he’s ever entered, and several he hasn't. He invented wool, but is so modest he allows sheep to take the credit. Tony once sang the national anthem at a baseball game, though he was not in the vicinity of the microphone at the time. He is often credited for having coined the popular golf and basketball phrase, "nice shot."