First, let me be a little bit obnoxious. It's a great way to start things, sometimes.

Do you know the Zen story about the empty cup? Here it is, in case you haven't heard it (or don't watch Bruce Lee movies):
<blockquote><em><strong>A university professor went to visit a famous Zen master. While the master quietly served tea, the professor talked about Zen. The master poured the visitor's cup to the brim, and then kept pouring. The professor watched the overflowing cup until he could no longer restrain himself. "It's overfull! No more will go in!" the professor blurted. "You are like this cup," the master replied, "How can I show you Zen unless you first empty your cup." </strong>- via <a href="http://users.rider.edu/~suler/zenstory/emptycup.html">Zen Stories to Tell Your Neighbors</a></em></blockquote>
I am not telling you this because I fancy myself a Zen master -- far from it!

I'm sharing the story because I always bring it to mind when I have to say no to something. I remind myself that by saying noAnd when you're a small blogger, you have to say no. You have to say it a lot.

Why? People will ask you to work for free. People will assume that you are desperate for exposure, and will take advantage of you.

Here's the thing: You are not desperate for exposure. You are a blogger. You are out there. Yes, you are not famous (yet!) but <em>you are out there enough that the person asking you to work for free found you</em>.

They need you more than you need them. I'M SERIOUS ABOUT THIS.

Wanna know a little secret? I've written for wonderful clients with hugely trafficked sites, where I get a byline and links and you know how much traffic I receive from that to my own blog? Very little. Blogging for big sites has its rewards, but traffic and new readers simply isn't it.

You have to say no. You have to say it a lot, so you better get comfortable with doing it.