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                            [post_date] => 2012-01-13 15:40:53
                            [post_date_gmt] => 2012-01-13 20:40:53
                            [post_content] => Before my first child was born, I was concerned that I would never wake up if he cried in the night.  I was SUCH a sound sleeper BC (before children).  But I needn't have worried. As soon as Andrew was born, I discovered I had developed a "mommy brain."

[caption id="attachment_448" align="aligncenter" width="325" caption="Andrew as a newborn"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/AndrewNewborn.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-448  " title="AndrewNewborn" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/AndrewNewborn-663x1024.jpg" alt="" width="325" height="501" /></a>[/caption]

You mothers out there know what "mommy brain" is: that condition where you become mentally fuzzy on details you thought you'd never forget, while at the same time you develop an uncanny ability to hear your baby's cry and know whether he is hungry, tired, sick, bored, in pain or just wants his mommy.

<a title="prenatal_origins_ of_infant_maternal_bonding" href="http://cdp.sagepub.com/content/20/6/384.abstract" target="_blank">A review of new research</a> suggests that "prenatal hormone exposures are critical for priming the maternal brain for the challenges of motherhood and have implications for the mother’s brain structure and function that may last the rest of her lifetime."  And<a title="pregnancy_and_mommy_brain" href="http://www.newsucanuse.org/pregnancy-and-mommy-brain/" target="_blank"> mommy brain probably explains </a>why new mothers wake up when their babies merely whimper in their sleep.

[caption id="attachment_214" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Lisette, age 3, with Debi, doing some mother-daughter bonding."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/LisetteDebiPorchswing.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-214" title="Debi with Lisette" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/LisetteDebiPorchswing-300x219.jpg" alt="Debi with Lisette" width="300" height="219" /></a>[/caption]

During pregnancy, a mom  is exposed to a massive hormonal shift, that according to this research, readies her brain for the challenges of motherhood, "helping her becomes less rattled by stress and more attuned to her baby’s needs."
<div class="mceTemp mceIEcenter" style="text-align: left;"><dl id="attachment_453" class="wp-caption aligncenter" style="width: 310px;"><dt class="wp-caption-dt"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/LisetteNewbornFeatured.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-453" title="LisetteNewbornFeatured" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/LisetteNewbornFeatured-300x160.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="160" /></a></dt><dd class="wp-caption-dd">Debi and Lisette on the day she was born. That's Andrew nose-to-nose with his new sister and Matthew peering over his shoulder.</dd></dl></div>
<div class="mceTemp mceIEcenter" style="text-align: left;">So, in the same way that a mother, and how she takes care of herself during pregnancy, impacts the baby, the fetus affects the mom. When a baby moves in utero, even if the mother cannot feel the movement, the mother's heart rate rises and her skin conductance response is aroused - the phenomenon when skin momentarily becomes a better conductor of electricity, indicating an emotional response.</div>
<div class="mceTemp mceIEcenter" style="text-align: left;"></div>
<div class="mceTemp mceIEcenter" style="text-align: left;">How amazing! From the very beginning of life, mothers and their babies are fearfully and wonderfully - an intricately - made.</div>
                            [post_title] => New Evidence Confirms Mommy Brain
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-10-09 08:02:28
                                    [post_date_gmt] => 2012-10-09 12:02:28
                                    [post_content] => Happy Birthday - on September 24 - to my precious baby, my youngest son, Jonathan.  Some of my favorite Jonathan stories:

5) Soccer was Jonathan's sport. One night, playing for Rome High his junior year, Jonathan was kicked in his head. When the resulting gash bled, Jonathan was forced to leave the game.

His coach almost never took Jonathan out of the game.

[caption id="attachment_982" align="alignleft" width="278"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/Jonkicking.jpg"><img class="wp-image-982 " title="Jonkicking" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/Jonkicking-745x1024.jpg" alt="" width="278" height="383" /></a> Jonathan playing sweeper for Rome High[/caption]

Dr. Rogers, whose sons also played for Rome High, offered to take Jonathan into the weight room to stitch up the gash.  Jonathan, his Dad and Dr. Rogers disappeared into the school, while Jonathan's mother - me - paced back and forth between the field and the school.  I didn't know exactly what they were doing, only that Jonathan was getting stitched up. I certainly didn't know, until later, that Gregg held a flashlight to provide Dr. Rogers with enough light to do the stitches.

The doctor gave Jonathan a choice: a local anesthesia for pain, and Jonathan would not be able to return to the game.  Or no anesthesia and he could continue to play.  Jonathan opted to go back in the game.

Six stitches later, Jonathan came running out of the school. He waved as he ran past me, and up to the sidelines, where his coach put him immediately back in the game.

[caption id="attachment_985" align="alignright" width="239"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/J-headballL-grad.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-985  " title="J headballL grad" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/J-headballL-grad.jpg" alt="" width="239" height="173" /></a> Jonathan heading the ball, in Mark and Angela's backyard, in May 2007, while Benjamin watched.[/caption]

Gregg and I returned to our seats in the stands, just in time to sit down, tell our fellow spectators that he's gotten 6 stitches, then we looked up to see Jonathan head the ball down the field. The same head in which a doctor had just sewn six stitches.

You should have heard the collective gasp from the Rome High parents. I can confidently tell you that my youngest son is one tough young man.

He certainly earned some serious macho points at Rome High that night.

4) Jonathan's cousin Lillian is only two months older than he is, and she lived in the same town, growing up. I babysat for Lillian while her mother worked. People saw Jonathan and Lillian together and thought they were twins.

<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/JonLil-3-yr.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1273 alignright" title="JonLil 3 yr" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/JonLil-3-yr.jpg" alt="" width="359" height="212" /></a>

Lillian's role in life seemed to be to tell Jonathan what to do. Jonathan's job seemed to be to drive Lillian crazy by NOT doing what she wanted him to do.

One day, when they were not quite two years old, the three of us were driving somewhere. I could hear the two of them, conversing behind me. Lillian talked in long, clear sentences; Jonathan still mostly babbled. On this occasion,  he said something like, "La-la-ta-ta-do-do. . ."

"Aunt Debi," Lillian informed me, "Jonathan just said 'Do-do'." One of Lillian's secondary roles in life was to recruit me to help her keep Jonathan in line.

[caption id="attachment_1293" align="alignleft" width="278"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/JonLilOlympic-torch.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1293  " title="JonLilOlympic torch" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/JonLilOlympic-torch-731x1024.jpg" alt="" width="278" height="390" /></a> Jonathan and Lillian holding the Olympic Torch in 1996.[/caption]

I explained to Lillian that children Jonathan's age often babbled, making noises just for fun or to try out sounds. But I noticed that Jonathan had picked up on our conversation and understood that the "do-do" noise had special meaning for Lillian. Soon he was leaning forward in his car seat, looking straight at Lillian, saying "Do-do-do-do-do-do!"  Just to drive her crazy.

3) The first year Jonathan played soccer for the YMCA, he scored 20 Goals in that one season. He was six years old and was used to playing soccer with his older siblings, brothers who were 9, 7 and 3 years older and a sister who was 5 years older.

They cut him some slack for being the youngest, but not much.

The other six-year-olds played "herd ball," running in a group up and down the field. While Jonathan stepped in, stole the ball and dribbled it into the goal.

[caption id="attachment_1282" align="aligncenter" width="480"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Jsoccerteam7yr.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1282 " title="Jsoccerteam7yr" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Jsoccerteam7yr.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="236" /></a> The year Jonathan was 7 years old, his soccer team was the Georgia state champions. This was the night they beat the Alabama state champions. That's Jonathan with his arms in the air.[/caption]

One game, the coach put Jonathan in as goalie, probably to give other players a chance to score. Jonathan <a title="Soccer Goalie Scores a Length-of-Field Goal" href="http://motherhoodstress.com/2012/01/07/soccer-goalie-scores-a-length-of-field-goal/" target="_blank">kicked the ball down the field</a> and scored anyway.

2) Three of my best friends at our church and I were all pregnant in 1988. We all had boys - Jonathan was the oldest, then Isaac, then Micah, then Aaron. Those four boys all went to PALS together, to Sunday School and Wednesday nights together. They played in the mud together. As teens, they all went on youth trips together. And they graduated from Rome High together.

[caption id="attachment_794" align="aligncenter" width="497"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/JonIsaacmud2.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-794" title="JonIsaacmud2" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/JonIsaacmud2.jpg" alt="" width="497" height="522" /></a> Isaac standing, watching Jonathan slide in the mud in front of our house. They were six years old.[/caption]

&nbsp;

[caption id="attachment_806" align="aligncenter" width="479"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/LilHuntIsaacAaronWedding.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-806 " title="LilHuntIsaacAaronWedding" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/LilHuntIsaacAaronWedding.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="281" /></a> Lillian, his cousin, Hunt, his best man, Isaac and Aaron at Jessica and Jonathan's wedding June 2011.[/caption]

1) Some of my favorite Jonathan photos, from over the years:

[caption id="attachment_1279" align="aligncenter" width="385"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/BenJonMatt2yr.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1279 " title="BenJonMatt2yr" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/BenJonMatt2yr.jpg" alt="" width="385" height="385" /></a> Benjamin and Matthew with his arm around Jonathan, age 2, in our yard. Those are the curls Jonathan once set on fire at the Christmas Eve candlelight service.[/caption]

&nbsp;

[caption id="attachment_1272" align="aligncenter" width="373"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Jon1-yr.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1272" title="Jon1 yr" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Jon1-yr.jpg" alt="" width="373" height="234" /></a> Jonathan at one year old.[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_1280" align="aligncenter" width="406"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/JonrunwithMark.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1280 " title="JonrunwithMark" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/JonrunwithMark-682x1024.jpg" alt="" width="406" height="609" /></a> Jonathan running with his cousin Mark Crouse, who is now in his teens.[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_1292" align="aligncenter" width="432"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/JonBenLisIndepHall.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1292" title="JonBenLisIndepHall" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/JonBenLisIndepHall.jpg" alt="" width="432" height="579" /></a> Benjamin, Jonathan and Lisette in Philadelphia. We have SO many pictures with someone's arm around Jonathan's shoulders.[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_1281" align="aligncenter" width="424"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/MattGJonBenVermnt.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1281 " title="MattGJonBenVermnt" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/MattGJonBenVermnt.jpg" alt="" width="424" height="400" /></a> Matthew, Gregg, Jonathan and Benjamin in Vermont in 2006.[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_1290" align="aligncenter" width="480"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/JonLexcamera.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1290 " title="JonLexcamera" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/JonLexcamera.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="467" /></a> Jonathan's major at Asbury University was media communications. Here he is a camera operator for the Lexington Legends, while he was a student at Asbury.[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_1149" align="aligncenter" width="480"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/ALBJJGDgrad2011.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1149 " title="ALBJJGDgrad2011" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/ALBJJGDgrad2011.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="296" /></a> Lisette, Andrew, Jonathan, Jessica, Benjamin, Debi and Gregg, the day that Andrew and Jonathan graduated from Asbury University, May 2011.[/caption]

&nbsp;

[caption id="attachment_1148" align="aligncenter" width="480"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/AMLBJJGDwedding.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1148 " title="AMLBJJGDwedding" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/AMLBJJGDwedding.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="298" /></a> Our family June 2011, at Jessica and Jonathan's wedding.[/caption]
                                    [post_title] => HBTY, HBTY, HB dear Jonathan, HBTY!
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-09-10 23:00:26
                                    [post_date_gmt] => 2012-09-11 03:00:26
                                    [post_content] => On June 11, 2011, our youngest son Jonathan married his lovely wife Jessica, in High Bridge, Kentucky. <a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JonJesswedding.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1251" title="JonJesswedding" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JonJesswedding.jpg" alt="" width="437" height="360" /></a>

In recognition of her birthday, here is a list of Ten Reasons We Love Our DIL Jessica:

10) Jessica is adventuresome, fearless and willing to try new things.

<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JessWaterfall.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-1245" title="JessWaterfall" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JessWaterfall-688x1024.jpg" alt="" width="580" height="863" /></a>
<p style="text-align: center;">9) She, like Jonathan, is a dog-lover. And, like Jonathan, Jess grew up with and loves boxers. And she LOVES Oscar and LuLu, their dogs, pictured below.<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JonJessLuOscar.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1253" title="JonJessLuOscar" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JonJessLuOscar.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="363" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">8) Also, like Jonathan, she was a competitive soccer player. Jessica played on an Olympic Development soccer team when she was in high school. And, again like Jonathan, attended Asbury University on a soccer scholarship.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/Jessicasoccer.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1250" title="Jessicasoccer" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/Jessicasoccer.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="603" /></a></p>
7) As an athlete she takes her health seriously. And consequently, she cooks healthy, delicious meals for our son. And for us when we visit. Below is a photo of Jonathan and Jessica, the first time we visited them in their apartment in Georgetown, Kentucky.

I still like to roast veggies the way Jessica prepared them that evening. We enjoy <em>herbs de provence</em>, one of her favorite herbs for seasoning. She is an amazing cook.

<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JonJessGtown.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-1255" title="JonJessGtown" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JonJessGtown-768x1024.jpg" alt="" width="580" height="773" /></a>

6) She is studying health and nutrition, in order to become life coach.

5) And she values love, friendship and family.  She is a loving daughter to her father Jerry.
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JessicaJerry.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1249" title="JessicaJerry" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JessicaJerry.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="307" /></a></p>
 4) She is a loving and courageous daughter to her mother Tonya, and loving sister to her brother Chris.
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/TonyaJonJessChris.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1256" title="TonyaJonJessChris" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/TonyaJonJessChris.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="359" /></a></p>
3)She is a beautiful young woman and was an adorable little girl. Here she is at three years old. What a cutie!
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/Jessica3yrs.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1248" title="Jessica3yrs" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/Jessica3yrs.jpg" alt="" width="435" height="606" /></a></p>
And here she is in kindergarten.  See what I mean about being adorable?

<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JessicaKinder.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1246" title="JessicaKinder" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JessicaKinder.jpg" alt="" width="592" height="755" /></a>

2) She is a sweet Christian, who encourages Jonathan to be all God is calling him to be.

1) She loves Jonathan. How could we not love a woman who looks at our son this way?
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JessJonMillBerry.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1262" title="JessJonMillBerry" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JessJonMillBerry.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="409" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: center;">Happy Birthday, precious Jessica.....You are a gift from God to us (and Jonathan).  We love you!</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JessJonengageparty.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1247" title="JessJonengageparty" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/JessJonengageparty.jpg" alt="" width="431" height="405" /></a></p>
                                    [post_title] => Happy Birthday, Jessica!
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-08-25 23:27:06
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                                    [post_content] => Our daughter Sarah Lisette was born on August 23, just before 9 a.m. on a Tuesday morning.  Lisette was born at our home, with a doctor and a nurse-midwife in attendance.  Dr. Griffin, dressed in jeans and a wrinkled short sleeve shirt, slouched against the door frame of the bedroom and gave my husband Gregg instructions. So that Gregg could "catch" Lisette as she was born.

[caption id="attachment_457" align="aligncenter" width="479"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/LisetteBornAM1.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-457 " title="LisetteBornAM" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/LisetteBornAM1.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="335" /></a> The day Lisette was born. That's Andrew nose-to-nose with his new sister and Matthew peering over his shoulder.[/caption]

One of the joys of home birth is having older siblings included in the birth. Andrew and Matthew came into the room to greet their sister just minutes after Lisette was born.

Lisette was SUCH a happy baby. She enjoyed nursing. She gurgled and giggled and played and smiled. And smiled.

[caption id="attachment_1119" align="aligncenter" width="482"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Lisette6mo.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1119" title="Lisette6mo" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Lisette6mo.jpg" alt="" width="482" height="653" /></a> Lisette at 6 months old[/caption]

Lisette spent a lot of time watching and laughing at the antics of her two older brothers.

[caption id="attachment_173" align="aligncenter" width="499"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/AML-L6months.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-173" title="Andrew, Matthew, Lisette" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/AML-L6months.jpg" alt="Andrew, Matthew, Lisette" width="499" height="655" /></a> Matthew and Andrew playing with Lisette - our first three miracles[/caption]

The Shaw side of our family had four boys born in quick succession: Joey; Andrew; Joshua and Matthew. Then four girls: Amanda; Brannon; Lisette and Jessica. (Our son Benjamin was born between Lisette and Jessica.)

[caption id="attachment_1034" align="aligncenter" width="518"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/girlcousinsMexicoBeach.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1034" title="girlcousinsMexicoBeach" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/girlcousinsMexicoBeach.jpg" alt="" width="518" height="335" /></a> Lisette, Brannon, Amanda and Jessica, four girl cousins having fun at the family beach vacation[/caption]

So Lisette had close-in-age girl cousins to play with. Brannon was only 19 days older and lived in the same town.  And she had a brother only 19 months younger.

[caption id="attachment_178" align="aligncenter" width="500"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/Lisette-at-3.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-178" title="Lisette at 3" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/Lisette-at-3.jpg" alt="" width="500" height="659" /></a> Our Precious Lisette, at age 3[/caption]

&nbsp;

[caption id="attachment_198" align="aligncenter" width="363"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/lisette-zipline.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-198" title="lisette zipline" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/lisette-zipline.jpg" alt="" width="363" height="472" /></a> Lisette braved the zipline over the Hersey River, by herself. She was - and is - courageous and adventuresome.[/caption]

And she is a WONDERFUL sister! To the two brothers who are older and to the two brothers who are younger.

[caption id="attachment_620" align="aligncenter" width="432"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/JBLPhilly7-yr.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-620" title="JB&amp;LPhilly7 yr" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/JBLPhilly7-yr.jpg" alt="" width="432" height="579" /></a> Benjamin (10), Jonathan (7) and Lisette (12) in Philadelphia, in front of Independence Hall[/caption]

Lisette spent two years as a missionary-teacher in Kenya, running a one-room school for the children of missionary doctors and nurses at Tenwek Hospital in Bomet, Kenya. She plans to return to Kenya again next January. Check out her <a title="Third World Viewpoint" href="http://http://lisetteinkenya.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">blog here.</a>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/GlobalCafeLisette_21-e1321227694118.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-584" title="GlobalCafeLisette_2" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/GlobalCafeLisette_21-e1321227694118.jpg" alt="" width="432" height="199" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: center;">She is amazing!</p>
                                    [post_title] => Every Mother Should Have a Daughter
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-08-22 11:19:44
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                                    [post_content] => Two different fertility specialists told us that we would probably never have children.  When I discovered that I was pregnant with Andrew, our first child, we were seeing the doctor who was the head of the fertility clinic at Loyola University in Chicago.  She referred to Andrew as our "miracle baby."

[caption id="attachment_1206" align="aligncenter" width="509"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Andrewnewborn2.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1206" title="Andrewnewborn2" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Andrewnewborn2.jpg" alt="" width="509" height="585" /></a> Andrew was born at Delnor Community Hospital in St. Charles,<br />Illinois[/caption]

Andrew was the first "Leboyer" baby ever born at Delnor.  As soon as he was born, the doctor handed him to his daddy and Gregg held our precious baby in a warm "Leboyer" bath, to sooth him at his entrance into a new world.  And Andrew looked around.

The doctor commented that he'd never seen a baby, who cried only once, and then appeared to examine the delivery room intently.  That was our first clue that Andrew would be a very visual learner.

[caption id="attachment_1127" align="aligncenter" width="580"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Andrew6mofingers.jpg"><img class="size-large wp-image-1127" title="Andrew6mofingers" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Andrew6mofingers-717x1024.jpg" alt="" width="580" height="828" /></a> Andrew at 6 months old - love those big, observant eyes![/caption]

I knew I wanted to breastfeed our babies. I did not know how much I would enjoy breastfeeding.  And Andrew latched on quickly and nursed slowly.  He would nurse a little, then look around the room.  Then nurse a little more and look around again.

He is still a visual person!

Before Andrew was  born, I was SUCH a sound sleeper!  I worried that I would never wake up when he cried at night.  The first night we were home from the hospital, I heard every time he turned over. And every car that pulled out of our apartment complex.  And all the people who talked on the sidewalk outside beside the apartment.

At one point, I turned to Gregg and asked if we needed to call the police. Surely something was wrong! He laughed and assured me that cars and people came and went every night. But, before, I had always slept through the noise.

[caption id="attachment_1166" align="aligncenter" width="554"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Andrewnewfromhospital.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1166" title="Andrewnewfromhospital" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Andrewnewfromhospital.jpg" alt="" width="554" height="584" /></a> The day we brought Andrew home from the hospital.[/caption]

The other personality trait we learned early on was that Andrew is a very active person.  He loved to move as a baby.  And he is a do-it-now, get-it-done person as an adult.

[caption id="attachment_975" align="aligncenter" width="357"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/Andrewsoccer2.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-975" title="Andrewsoccer2" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/Andrewsoccer2.jpg" alt="" width="357" height="435" /></a> Andrew played soccer from 6 years old through high school.[/caption]

Things I still love about our first-born son. . . 1) He is such a happy, eager to please, eager to smile person. He gives everything he does 110 percent of his energy and enthusiasm.

[caption id="attachment_42" align="aligncenter" width="500"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/Andrew-1-year-old.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-42" title="Andrew" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/Andrew-1-year-old.jpg" alt="Andrew" width="500" height="619" /></a> Andrew when he was a year old[/caption]

&nbsp;

&nbsp;

[caption id="attachment_733" align="aligncenter" width="424"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/Andrew110.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-733 " title="Andrew110" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/Andrew110.jpg" alt="" width="424" height="603" /></a> Not hard to see that gung-ho, give-it-everything-I've-got personality trait, is it?[/caption]

Another thing I love about Andrew. . .2) He is such a spiritually sensitive person.  Before his stroke in 2006 - at age 26 - he worked with inner-city gang kids in Los Angeles, with the mission organization <a href="http://ywamla.org/home/YWAM_Los_Angeles" target="_blank">YWAM-LA.</a>  He was not afraid to spend time in Watts and Gardenia - some of the worst areas of that big city - talking with and ministering to young people who needed Jesus.

Even as a child, he was eager to know more about Jesus. He was only six years old when he asked Jesus into his heart.

And 3) Andrew is such a good big brother. He takes his responsibility toward his younger siblings, very seriously.

[caption id="attachment_1120" align="aligncenter" width="560"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/BenJonAndrewatMothers.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1120 " title="BenJonAndrewatMothers" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/BenJonAndrewatMothers.jpg" alt="" width="560" height="400" /></a> Benjamin and Jonathan with Andrew - always a good big brother.[/caption]

On August 15, Andrew celebrated his 33rd birthday.  Happy birthday to our precious first-born son!

&nbsp;
                                    [post_title] => Andrew, Miracle Baby, Visual Learner, Good Big Brother
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                                    [post_modified] => 2012-08-22 12:39:12
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-07-07 12:17:43
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                                    [post_content] => Five years ago today, our son Matthew married Emily Marie Brown, in the chapel at Dartmouth College.

[caption id="attachment_166" align="aligncenter" width="600"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/cropped-EmilyMattWed.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-166 " title="cropped-EmilyMattWed.jpg" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/cropped-EmilyMattWed.jpg" alt="" width="600" height="173" /></a> Lisette, Jonathan, Matthew, Emily, Gregg, Debi and Andrew on 7-7-2007[/caption]

We LOVE our son Matthew.
                                    [post_title] => Happy Annivesary to Emily and Matthew
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-07-06 00:01:35
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                                    [post_content] => We got the first phone call just after 11 a.m. on Sunday, July 2, 2006. My husband Gregg was already home from church, starting Sunday dinner. When I walked in the house, just after noon, he told me, “Andrew’s in the hospital in California. They think he may be having a stroke.”

[caption id="attachment_1206" align="aligncenter" width="509"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Andrewnewborn2.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1206" title="Andrewnewborn2" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Andrewnewborn2.jpg" alt="" width="509" height="585" /></a> Andrew as a newborn[/caption]

In 2006, our oldest son Andrew was 26 years old. For two years he had been working for Youth with a Mission (YWAM) in Los Angeles, reaching out to gang members already in trouble with the LAPD.

At first, Andrew’s friend and YWAM boss, Lisa told us that Andrew was conscious and doctors were hopeful.  We began to discuss which one of us would fly out to California to be with Andrew, and which would stay home and drive our youngest son Jonathan to Camp Glisson.

[caption id="attachment_1204" align="aligncenter" width="580"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/GD-A15months.jpg"><img class="size-large wp-image-1204" title="GD&amp; A15months" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/GD-A15months-726x1024.jpg" alt="" width="580" height="818" /></a> Gregg and me, with Andrew when he was 15 months old[/caption]
<p style="text-align: left;">And we called friends and asked for prayer. And those friends called other friends.</p>
Lisa called again with a report, and then again a little later. Each call painted a grimmer picture of what was happening with our oldest son. He’d lost consciousness. . . . They’d had to intubate him to keep him breathing. . . . An MRI showed a bleeding brainstem stroke. . . . People rarely survive a brainstem stroke.

[caption id="attachment_1207" align="aligncenter" width="580"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Andrewkindergarten.jpg"><img class="size-large wp-image-1207" title="Andrewkindergarten" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Andrewkindergarten-745x1024.jpg" alt="" width="580" height="797" /></a> Andrew in kindergarten[/caption]

Our friends Amanda and Greg called and offered to take Jonathan to Glisson. Our friend Wynn called and offered us his Delta frequent flyer miles and then called Delta and got us both on a plane non-stop to L. A.. My brother-in-law Jim called and told us that he and my sister Joan would drive us to the airport.

When Wynn called with our flight info, we had ten minutes to pack and leave the house. We walked back to our room, grabbed suitcases, threw things in them. Somehow we managed to climb in the car with Jim and Joan ten minutes after Wynn’s phone call. I packed a book on American Sign Language, but forgot to take a nightgown.

I will always associate the clothes I tossed in the suitcase that day with the events of the following 7 weeks.

[caption id="attachment_1208" align="aligncenter" width="600"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Andrewbaseball.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1208" title="Andrewbaseball" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Andrewbaseball.jpg" alt="" width="600" height="841" /></a> Andrew playing baseball at age 6[/caption]

Still in shock, we just chatted with Joan and Jim on the way to the airport. On the plane we were not seated together. We each sat alone in a jam-packed plane and wondered if our Andrew would still be alive when we arrived. Prayed and asked God for a miracle.

A friend of Andrew’s - neither of us remember who - drove us straight from the L.A. airport to Olive View Medical Center, a UCLA teaching hospital on the edge of the San Gabriel mountains.

I have no visual memory of walking in and seeing Andrew attached to all the tubes and machines. Shock can be a blessing that way.

[caption id="attachment_1127" align="aligncenter" width="580"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Andrew6mofingers.jpg"><img class="size-large wp-image-1127" title="Andrew6mofingers" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Andrew6mofingers-717x1024.jpg" alt="" width="580" height="828" /></a> Andrew at 6 months old[/caption]

The first couple of weeks, Andrew’s life hung in the balance. We prayed. We cried. His YWAM friends came, hugged us and prayed with us over Andrew. And I sang.

Andrew was hooked up to a machine that took his blood pressure every 10 minutes. We watched the machine as his blood pressure zoomed up and down. Listened as the nurses urgently discussed what to do when the readings hit dangerous, stroke-level highs. Heard the panic in their voices as they called doctors and pharmacists and asked if there was <em>anything</em> else they could possibly try.

At one such panicky moment, in the first 24 hours we were there, the doctors and nurses had done all they knew to do to bring Andrew’s blood pressure back down, and nothing was helping. All signs indicated an eminent, almost-certainly fatal, second stroke.

[caption id="attachment_1167" align="aligncenter" width="480"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/AwithGGrandpaLewisGra.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1167 " title="AwithGGrandpaLewisGra" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/AwithGGrandpaLewisGra.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="337" /></a> Andrew with his Dad, his Grandpa and his great-grandpa Lewis[/caption]

Not knowing what else to do, but wanting to do SOMETHING for my 26 year old baby, I started to sing to him. As I had done when he was little and needed to calm down enough to sleep. I’ve always believed the idea was inspired by God.

I sang Isaiah 43:<em> When you pass through the waters, I will be with you. And the waves they will not overcome you. Do not fear, for I have redeemed you. I have called you by name. You are Mine. I am the Lord your God. I am the Holy One, of Israel, your Savior. Do not fear. Do not fear. I am the Lord.</em>

And I sang: <em>Great is Thy Faithfulness, O God my Father, there is no shadow of turning with Thee. Thou changest not. Thy compassions they fail not. As Thou hast been, Thou forever wilt be. . . Morning by morning new mercies I see. All I have needed Thy hand hast provided. Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord unto me.</em>

[caption id="attachment_1209" align="aligncenter" width="580"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Andrew-grad.jpg"><img class="size-large wp-image-1209" title="Andrew grad" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Andrew-grad-776x1024.jpg" alt="" width="580" height="765" /></a> Andrew's high school senior photo[/caption]

And I sang Isaiah 40: <em>Have you not known? Have you not heard? The everlasting God, the Lord, Creator of all the earth, never grows weary. He never gets tired. His understanding is beyond compare. And He will lift you up on eagle’s wings. He will give you strength. He will lift you up on eagle’s wings. Those who wait for Him</em>.

And when I sang, Andrew calmed down. Just like he had as an active baby. And his blood pressure inched back down to safer levels.

[caption id="attachment_1205" align="aligncenter" width="479"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Andrew2010.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1205 " title="Andrew2010" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Andrew2010.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="518" /></a> Andrew in 2010, watching his youngest brother film a baseball game[/caption]

More later about those seven weeks of our lives, and the way God’s hand moved in the life of our precious son.
                                    [post_title] => I Sang My Baby to Sleep
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                                    [post_content] => We were in California the summer of 2006 when we got a phone call from our son Matthew, telling us that he had proposed to Emily Brown . . . and that she had said "yes."

[caption id="attachment_1185" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="The evening Matthew proposed. How could we not love a woman who looked at our son like that!"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/MattEmilyRed_1.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1185 " title="MattEmilyRed_1" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/MattEmilyRed_1.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="506" /></a>[/caption]

We had met Emily - and fallen in love with her - when we'd visited Matthew in New Hampshire earlier that year.  We were overjoyed with their good news.

[caption id="attachment_1186" align="aligncenter" width="479" caption="Matthew and Emily, at the top of Moosilauke"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/moosilauke.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1186 " title="moosilauke" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/moosilauke.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="356" /></a>[/caption]

How well suited Emily is for Matthew! They both love hiking.

[caption id="attachment_1193" align="aligncenter" width="512" caption="Emily grew up doing some mountain climbing. Here she is at 7 years old."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/EmilyClimbing7rs.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1193" title="EmilyClimbing7rs" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/EmilyClimbing7rs.jpg" alt="" width="512" height="629" /></a>[/caption]
<p style="text-align: center;">And she is an incredibly gifted artist. You should check out her quilts, and her photography on her website at <a href="http://greensandjeans.com/">http://greensandjeans.com/</a></p>


[caption id="attachment_1194" align="aligncenter" width="580" caption="Emily at 3 years. What a cutie!"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/Emily3yr.jpg"><img class="size-large wp-image-1194" title="Emily3yr" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/Emily3yr-759x1024.jpg" alt="" width="580" height="782" /></a>[/caption]

One of the joys of their wedding on July 7, 2007 was that, in preparation for the rehearsal dinner, I got to put together a slide show of photographs of Emily and Matthew, as they were growing up.  By the time I had gone through all the adorable pictures of Emily as a baby. . . and a two year old . . . and a teen, I felt almost as if I'd gotten to see her blossom as a child.

[caption id="attachment_1192" align="aligncenter" width="457" caption="Emiy at 9 years old"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/Emily-9yrs.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1192 " title="Emily 9yrs" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/Emily-9yrs.jpg" alt="" width="457" height="360" /></a>[/caption]

&nbsp;

[caption id="attachment_1190" align="aligncenter" width="493" caption="Emily in high school"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/Emily-teen.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1190" title="Emily teen" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/Emily-teen.jpg" alt="" width="493" height="512" /></a>[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_1188" align="aligncenter" width="479" caption="Emily and Matthew have done a LOT of mountain climbing."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/MattEmilyGile.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1188 " title="MattEmilyGile" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/MattEmilyGile.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="234" /></a>[/caption]

&nbsp;

[caption id="attachment_1187" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="A few months before their wedding"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/MattEmilyBaltimore.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1187 " title="MattEmilyBaltimore" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/MattEmilyBaltimore.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="535" /></a>[/caption]

&nbsp;

[caption id="attachment_1070" align="aligncenter" width="232" caption="Matthew and Emily on their wedding day, July 7, 2007"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/EmilyMatthew-7-7-07.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1070" title="Emily&amp;Matthew 7-7-07" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/EmilyMatthew-7-7-07.jpg" alt="" width="232" height="234" /></a>[/caption]

&nbsp;

[caption id="attachment_1184" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Last Christmas Eve, Emily and Matthew played the roles of Mary and Joseph, in our church&#39;s Live Nativity."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/MENativity.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1184 " title="M&amp;ENativity" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/MENativity.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="360" /></a>[/caption]

&nbsp;

Happy Birthday, precious Emily.....You are a gift from God to us (and Matthew).  We love you!
                                    [post_title] => Happy Birthday, Emily!
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-04-30 22:26:05
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                                    [post_content] => In Fall 1969, as a freshman at Asbury College in Wilmore, Kentucky, I was assigned to a lab table in Biology 101. My lab partner and I sat on one side of that lab table and Gregg Lewis and his lab partner sat on the other side. Gregg Lewis . . . a tall, blond basketball player, a good-looking jock. But I had two classes with him and quickly discovered that he was  a very bright student, as well as a good-looking athlete.

[caption id="attachment_1151" align="alignleft" width="274" caption="Gregg as a cute, blond kindergartener."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/GreggKinder.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1151" title="GreggKinder" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/GreggKinder.jpg" alt="" width="274" height="389" /></a>[/caption]

At one point that Fall I learned that he had grown up in Wilmore. So I asked my friend Julia, also from Wilmore, what she could tell me about Gregg Lewis. "Oh," she exclaimed, "Gregg is wonderful. Really smart. A great basketball player. A very nice person. But, he is going steady with Donna."

Over the years, when I would tell this story to our children, I would invest my voice with scorn when I said the name, "Donna."

I always picked up my mail at the CPO before going to Biology class. One day, I sat down at the lab table and opened a letter from my sister Janice. Gregg looked across the lab table and saw the return address.

"You know Janice Crouse?" he asked.

"She's my sister." I answered. And Gregg told me that he had gone to church with Janice when her husband Gilbert was the music director at that church.

[caption id="attachment_1152" align="alignright" width="336" caption="Ron, Gilbert, Jim and Terry, David and Gregg in front, 1980s"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Shawmen.jpg"><img class="wp-image-1152 " title="Shawmen" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Shawmen.jpg" alt="" width="336" height="230" /></a>[/caption]

Another day I opened another letter, this one from my sister Joan. Again, Gregg looked at the return address and asked, "You know Joan Turrentine?"

"She's my sister," I told him. And learned that Gregg had played basketball with Joan's husband Jim, and that Joan had taught at his high school.

[caption id="attachment_1159" align="alignright" width="278" caption="Matthew dunks the ball, while his Daddy holds him, and Andrew waits his turn."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/GAMbasketball.jpg"><img class="wp-image-1159 " title="GAMbasketball" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/GAMbasketball-698x1024.jpg" alt="" width="278" height="408" /></a>[/caption]

Later that Fall, my BIL Jim had tickets to the Atlanta Braves playoff games. I went home to Georgia to watch the Braves lose to the Mets.

My first day back at Asbury, after the Christmas break that year, I was cleaning steam tables in the cafeteria, one of my campus jobs, when Gregg Lewis walked up and asked me if I'd like to go snow sledding that evening. I assured him that sounded like fun.  We double dated with my brother Mark and his then-girlfriend Martha Crouse.

After sledding down the hill several times, we went to the Grill for hot chocolate and conversation.

We married on March 9, 1973, during Spring Break of our senior year.

[caption id="attachment_1155" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Gregg with his brothers Mark and Mack at our wedding. In 1973. A VERY 70s wedding!"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/GMarkMackwedding.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1155 " title="GMarkMackwedding" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/GMarkMackwedding.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="286" /></a>[/caption]

&nbsp;

[caption id="attachment_1154" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Our wedding took place at Epworth United Methodist Church in Atlanta."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/DGweddinggaze.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1154" title="DGweddinggaze" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/DGweddinggaze.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="320" /></a>[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_1170" align="aligncenter" width="348" caption="Since we were married before graduation, we walked across the stage together. And Dr. Dennis Kinlaw handed us our diplomas."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/DGgradcollege.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1170 " title="DGgradcollege" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/DGgradcollege-695x1024.jpg" alt="" width="348" height="512" /></a>[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_1171" align="aligncenter" width="469" caption="In 1974 we traveled to Yellowstone. Gregg LOVES fishing."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Greggfishingyellowstone.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1171" title="Greggfishingyellowstone" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Greggfishingyellowstone.jpg" alt="" width="469" height="612" /></a>[/caption]

&nbsp;

[caption id="attachment_1165" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Gregg, with his parents, Margie and Ralph Lewis, and Andrew on the day we bought Andrew home from the hospital in August 1979."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Gproudpapa.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1165 " title="Gproudpapa" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Gproudpapa.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="325" /></a>[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_1168" align="aligncenter" width="479" caption="Gregg with Matthew in 1981."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/GMattbaby.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1168 " title="GMattbaby" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/GMattbaby.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="427" /></a>[/caption]

&nbsp;

[caption id="attachment_1172" align="aligncenter" width="196" caption="Gregg with Andrew, Matthew and Lisette, reading, &quot;And To Think That I Saw it On Mulberry Street.&quot; Love that book. Love those children. Love that man."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/AMLGreading.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1172 " title="AMLGreading" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/AMLGreading.jpg" alt="" width="196" height="219" /></a>[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_1153" align="aligncenter" width="489" caption="Gregg at age 28. He was an editor at Campus Life Magazine when this was taken."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Gat28yrs.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1153" title="Gat28yrs" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Gat28yrs.jpg" alt="" width="489" height="582" /></a>[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_1161" align="aligncenter" width="479" caption="Gregg reading to Matthew, while my Mother and my Daddy look on. Did I mention that Gregg is an author? That he&#39;&#39;s had 50-plus books published?"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/RuthCharlesGreggMatt.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1161 " title="RuthCharlesGreggMatt" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/RuthCharlesGreggMatt.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="420" /></a>[/caption]

&nbsp;

[caption id="attachment_1156" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Tall, good-looking man, with three of his tall, good-looking sons. . . Matthew, Gregg, Jonathan and Benjamin. Andrew and Lisette were not with us on that trip."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/MGJBvermont.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1156 " title="MGJBvermont" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/MGJBvermont.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="343" /></a>[/caption]

&nbsp;

[caption id="attachment_1162" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Grandpa Lewis, Matthew at 6 months, Gregg&#39;s dad, Andrew at 2 years, and my tall, good-looking husband."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/GrpaLewisGrpaMAG.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1162 " title="GrpaLewis,Grpa,MAG" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/GrpaLewisGrpaMAG.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="311" /></a>[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_1148" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Our family last June, at Jessica and Jonathan&#39;s wedding."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/AMLBJJGDwedding.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1148 " title="AMLBJJGDwedding" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/AMLBJJGDwedding.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="298" /></a>[/caption]

&nbsp;

Today, April 30 is Gregg's birthday. Happy birthday to my tall, good-looking husband!
                                    [post_title] => My Husband's Birthday
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                                    [post_modified] => 2012-04-30 22:26:05
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-04-28 08:35:27
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                                    [post_content] => Over and over, while my children were growing up, I told them "Nobody gets to be perfect."  When I made mistakes, I would own up to them, apologize and say, "Nobody gets to be perfect.  Not even your Mama. Only Jesus got to be perfect."

[caption id="attachment_747" align="aligncenter" width="475" caption="Benjamin with Jonathan on the day of Jonathan&#39;s birth."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/BenjJonfeatured.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-747 " title="BenjJonfeatured" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/BenjJonfeatured.jpg" alt="" width="475" height="256" /></a>[/caption]

When their friends would do or say unkind things, I would explain that "Nobody gets to be perfect, not even your best friend." And I would urge them to forgive and go on with the friendship.

When they made mistakes and felt stupid, I would reassure them, "Nobody gets to be perfect. Everyone makes mistakes. Don't be so hard on yourself."And I would encourage them to admit their mistake, ask for forgiveness where needed, and to forgive themselves.

In light of "Nobody gets to be perfect:" I am admitting two mistakes in my last blog post.  First, I included baby photos of my first four babies, as a part of telling the lead-up to Benjamin's birth.  And while I included a photo of Jonathan (our fifth child) with his older brother Benjamin, I did NOT include a cute baby photo.

[caption id="attachment_1142" align="aligncenter" width="355" caption="Jonathan, our fifth child, born 3 1/2 years after Benjamin. He is three months old in this photo - 23 years old now."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Jon3-mo.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1142" title="Jon3 mo" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Jon3-mo.jpg" alt="" width="355" height="533" /></a>[/caption]
<p style="text-align: left;">And, in the last blog post, I was wrong about the dress code days at Lewis Academy. Benjamin dressed in dress shirts and ties on Mondays and Fridays, and added a suit coat to that on Wednesdays.  But Tuesday and Thursdays were "casual" days.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Please forgive me for my mistake. After all, nobody gets to be perfect.</p>
                                    [post_title] => Nobody Gets to Be Perfect
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-04-24 14:12:28
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                                    [post_content] => Before we had children, my husband Gregg and I had two different fertility specialists tell us that we would probably never have children. Then, when we had been married for six and a half years, we had our precious son Andrew (now 32).

[caption id="attachment_1127" align="aligncenter" width="479" caption="Andrew at 6 months old"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Andrew6mofingers.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1127 " title="Andrew6mofingers" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Andrew6mofingers.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="685" /></a>[/caption]

Eighteen months later, to the day, we had adorable Matthew (now 31).

[caption id="attachment_1076" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Matthew at 4 months old"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Mattbaby.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1076 " title="Mattbaby" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Mattbaby.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="596" /></a>[/caption]

Two and a half years later we had our beautiful daughter Lisette (now 28).

[caption id="attachment_1119" align="aligncenter" width="386" caption="Lisette at 6 months old"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Lisette6mo.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1119 " title="Lisette6mo" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Lisette6mo.jpg" alt="" width="386" height="522" /></a>[/caption]

Two boys and a girl. Most people thought we had our perfect family. BUT, we had decided that, since God had given us children as a "miracle" - an unexpected gift - that we would continue to love whatever children God wanted to give us.

So, nineteen months after Lisette, in April 1985, we welcomed our amazing son Benjamin (27 this month) into our family.

[caption id="attachment_1126" align="aligncenter" width="522" caption="Benjamin as a newborn"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/benjnewborn.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1126 " title="benjnewborn" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/benjnewborn-743x1024.jpg" alt="" width="522" height="719" /></a>[/caption]

When we called to tell my parents that we were expecting a fourth child, my mother gave us this wonderful advice: "People are thrilled for you when you have your first child. By the time the second one comes along, people take that for granted. . . no big deal,  just what they expected. When you have a third one, especially since your first two were boys, they'll think you are hoping for a girl. But when you have your fourth, people don't understand why on earth you would do that. But you will love this baby just like you love the others and will wonder how on earth you would have lived without him."  And she was, as she usually is, right!

[caption id="attachment_1123" align="aligncenter" width="479" caption="My Daddy rocking Benjamin to sleep"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/DaddyBenjNewborn.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1123" title="DaddyBenjNewborn" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/DaddyBenjNewborn.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="417" /></a>[/caption]
<p style="text-align: left;">I have MANY cute Benjamin stories to tell. That makes it difficult for me to pick only one or two to tell in a post, for his birthday.  Do I tell about the day he wanted to cut his OWN apple? I'd handed him a slice of apple with his breakfast and put the knife away - W-A-Y back on the kitchen counter. Then I'd walked to the front door, picked up the newspaper off the front stoop, and started scanning the headlines for the day, while I walked back toward the breakfast room.</p>


[caption id="attachment_1122" align="aligncenter" width="479" caption="Benjamin loved for his Grandpa to tickle him."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/BenjRalphtickle.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1122 " title="BenjRalphtickle" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/BenjRalphtickle.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="589" /></a>[/caption]

Then Benjamin screamed. I looked up to see that he had set down the apple slice I'd given him, pushed his chair over to the kitchen counter, climbed onto and across the counter, grabbed the knife and tried to cut his own slice of apple.  Cut himself to the bone. Needed stitches.

[caption id="attachment_1125" align="aligncenter" width="479" caption="This whole series of photos, taken when Benjamin was three years old, were given to us free, in exchange for letting the photographer use them in an advertisement. We were not the only people who thought he was a cutie!"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Benj3yrs.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1125 " title="Benj3yrs" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Benj3yrs.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="597" /></a>[/caption]

Or do I tell about the day of his kindergarten "round-up," when he was NOT in the mood to answer the questions, with which the school would place him in a kindergarten class. First one teacher, then another, asked him the required questions and he refused to talk. Finally our friend Augusta Davis, the third kindergarten teacher, tried. For her he condescended to answer two questions. What does your Daddy do for a living? He writes books.  What does your mother do? She washes dishes.

[caption id="attachment_1131" align="aligncenter" width="407" caption="Benjamin (7) and Jonathan (4) with their mother"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/BenDebiJon.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1131" title="BenDebiJon" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/BenDebiJon.jpg" alt="" width="407" height="323" /></a>[/caption]

At the END of kindergarten, his teacher told us that he was the first student she'd had, in 30 years of teaching, who had a "perfect" record, not a single mistake on any worksheet or test, for the entire year.

[caption id="attachment_1124" align="aligncenter" width="521" caption="Jonathan and Benjamin on Jonathan&#39;s first day of kindergarten. What a great big brother!"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/BenjJonAltoPark2.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1124" title="BenjJonAltoPark2" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/BenjJonAltoPark2.jpg" alt="" width="521" height="885" /></a>[/caption]

Or do I tell the story of the month before he started kindergarten, when every night for three weeks, he climbed into our bed, between 2 and 3 a.m., cuddled up next to me, put his sweet little hands on my cheeks, looked imploringly into my sleep-dazed eyes, his little nose only a inch or so from mine, and woke me up, saying "Mama, please don't make me go to kindergarten.  PLEASE, I don't want to go to kindergarten."

By the time school started I was prepared for the worst first-day-of-school ever. We had talked about the possibility of homeschooling him if the first month went as badly as we thought it might.

I was NOT prepared for him to run into the classroom, greeting the other children as if he were king of the class, without a backward glance at his mother. Who was standing in the doorway, her mouth gaping open, wishing he would at least give her a goodbye hug.  What WAS the last few weeks about anyway??

[caption id="attachment_1130" align="aligncenter" width="303" caption="Benjamin played soccer for the Arsenal, a club team."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Benjsoccer.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1130" title="Benjsoccer" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Benjsoccer.jpg" alt="" width="303" height="464" /></a>[/caption]

Or do I tell the story of his freshman year of high school, when doctors discovered a tumor in his ear. We spent a week waiting for the pathology report that told us - good news! - it was benign. The bad news was that, even benign, it needed surgery to be removed and had eaten away some of the bone around that ear.

Benjamin missed 18 days of school that year. But, even so, at the end of the year was still in the top five students at his high school, one of the students in the running for valedictorian.

That summer, he came and asked for a meeting with his Dad and me, to discuss the possibility of our homeschooling him for the remainder of high school.  Why? we asked.

"I already don't have enough time to play soccer or be in the band at Rome High, and also be competitive academically. I want to have time for art and music. Time to think and to play soccer. Life is too short to not have time for those things."

[caption id="attachment_1135" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Today Benjamin is getting his doctorate at Catholic University in Greek and Latin."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Ben2012.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1135 " title="Ben2012" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/Ben2012.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="577" /></a>[/caption]

We homeschooled Benjamin - or rather he homeschooled himself - his last three years of high school. Friends gave him a prom - one many said was the best prom they had ever attended.  He put out a CD of his own music -written by him, sung by him and for which he played the piano - before finishing high school. We have a house full of his art work. He sold 50+ t-shirts emblazoned with the Lewis Academy emblem.

[caption id="attachment_1136" align="aligncenter" width="464" caption="Benjamin attended the Lewis Academy Prom with his friend Lauren."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/LewisProm.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1136 " title="LewisProm" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/LewisProm-777x1024.jpg" alt="" width="464" height="611" /></a>[/caption]

One last Benjamin story: one morning, he came to breakfast dressed in a button-up shirt and tie. "Are you going somewhere special today?" I asked.

"No," Benjamin replied. "The student body at Lewis Academy has decided on a dress code. Shirts and ties on Mondays, Tuesday, Thursday and Fridays. Suit coats as well on Wednesdays."

[caption id="attachment_1120" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Benjamin, with Jonathan and Andrew, dressed for homeschool."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/BenJonAndrewatMothers.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1120 " title="BenJonAndrewatMothers" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/BenJonAndrewatMothers.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="343" /></a>[/caption]

And one very last story: the student body of Lewis Academy got up early each morning and fixed the family breakfast for all the years he was homeschooled.

[caption id="attachment_1133" align="aligncenter" width="479" caption="Benjamin with his three best college friends, Nathan, Drew and John, at their graduation from Asbury College in Wilmore, Kentucky."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/BenjJonNathanDrew.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1133 " title="BenjJonNathanDrew" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/BenjJonNathanDrew.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="332" /></a>[/caption]
                                    [post_title] => Our Son Benjamin, Artist, Scholar, Amazing
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                                    [post_modified] => 2012-04-24 14:42:08
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-03-24 12:41:39
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                                    [post_content] => We moved from Carol Stream, Illinois to Rome, Georgia almost 24 years ago. Georgia, the land of dogwoods and azaleas, the state where I spent most of my growing-up years.

[caption id="attachment_1096" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="A &quot;perfect&quot; dogwood blossom, from the tree in our front yard."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/dogwood1.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1096 " title="dogwood1" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/dogwood1.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="397" /></a>[/caption]

Andrew was 8 years old, Matthew 7, Lisette 4 years old and Benjamin 3 when we moved to Georgia.  I was pregnant with Jonathan, who was born in September that year.  <a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/dogwood2.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-medium wp-image-1095" title="dogwood2" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/dogwood2-300x199.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="199" /></a>

One of the joys of living in Georgia again was driving "over the mountain" - actually through a mountain pass - to take the children to elementary school. In the early spring the dogwood trees blossom before other trees fill out with leaves. So the dogwoods stand out in the forest and are a beautiful sight that announces the coming of Spring in the South.

[caption id="attachment_1090" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="The largest of the several dogwood trees in our front yard."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/dogwoodfulltree.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1090 " title="dogwoodfulltree" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/dogwoodfulltree.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="293" /></a>[/caption]
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/dogwood6.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1092" title="dogwood6" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/dogwood6.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="391" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: center;">When we moved in, a bank of 5 or 6 azalea bushes graced the front of our garage.  All but one of those bushes died in the Georgia blizzard of March 1993. But the one that is left is spectacular this Spring.  <a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/forsythia4.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1086" title="forsythia4" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/forsythia4.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="360" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/forsythia1.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1089" title="forsythia1" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/forsythia1.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="287" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/forsythia2.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1088" title="forsythia2" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/forsythia2.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="349" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/forsythia3.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1087" title="forsythia3" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/forsythia3.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="269" /></a></p>
                                    [post_title] => Spring is In the Air
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                                    [post_modified] => 2012-03-24 12:59:27
                                    [post_modified_gmt] => 2012-03-24 16:59:27
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                            [11] => WP_Post Object
                                (
                                    [ID] => 1055
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-03-11 21:04:50
                                    [post_date_gmt] => 0000-00-00 00:00:00
                                    [post_content] => "One of the best gifts I ever gave you," my mother told me recently, "was your brothers and sisters." How very true!  I LOVE being a part of a large family - seven siblings, five girls and two boys.  What a joy to have four sisters and two brothers!

[caption id="attachment_1057" align="aligncenter" width="479" caption="My parents, with all my siblings and my grandmother, at their 45th anniversary celebration in 1983. This is one of the last formal pictures taken with my Daddy."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Anniversary_45th.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1057 " title="Anniversary_45th" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Anniversary_45th.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="274" /></a>[/caption]

When I saw an article,<a title="The_Omnichild's_Dilemma" href="http://articles.boston.com/2012-01-30/opinion/30674003_1_child-abuse-parents-friend" target="_blank"> "The Omnichild's Dilemma,"</a> I clicked on the link and read one woman's tale of being a singleton.  She referred to being an only child as "child abuse — a cruelty that only gets worse as the Baby Boomers age."

"Consider my friend," the author says, "an only child struggling to care for her parents. . . but with young children and a full-time job, my friend can only do so much. Limitless, however, is the crushing sense of responsibility, angst, and guilt."

As I read that article, I thought of the contrast with my family. Last month, my brother-in-law had heart surgery. My sister had two siblings to sit with her through the long day of surgery, and other siblings who took turns coming by to encourage and distract her, to pray for her and her husband. Those at a distance called to offer their support.

Unlike people who have only one sibling, I have six people I can turn to when I need someone who has known me all my life, who remembers me as a stubborn preschoolers or a shy middle-school kid.

&nbsp;

&nbsp;
                                    [post_title] => The Joy of Siblings
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                                    [post_modified] => 2012-03-11 21:04:50
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                            [12] => WP_Post Object
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                                    [ID] => 1066
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-02-15 20:18:27
                                    [post_date_gmt] => 2012-02-16 01:18:27
                                    [post_content] => On Thursday morning, July 3, 1980, my husband Gregg was getting dressed for the day. I was still in bed, having gotten up in the night with our 10-month old son Andrew.  Gregg was telling me what he would be working on that day, when I told him, "I just felt a baby move."

[caption id="attachment_1076" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Matthew at 4 months old"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Mattbaby.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1076 " title="Mattbaby" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Mattbaby.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="596" /></a>[/caption]

Gregg looked up and saw that I had my hand on my belly.  "You . . what?"

"I just felt a baby move!" I repeated.  He and I just looked at each other. After all the fertility doctors we had seen, in our efforts to get pregnant with our first child, we couldn't believe that a second "miracle" would just happen.

[caption id="attachment_1072" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Great-Grandpa Lewis, Matthew, Grandpa, Andrew and Dad"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/MattGrandpas.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1072 " title="MattGrandpas" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/MattGrandpas.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="311" /></a>[/caption]

Later that day, I saw my doctor, had a pregnancy test and was told that we were expecting another miracle.

Since I had not had a period since before Andrew was born, we had no idea when our second child was due.  Our favorite doctor did some measuring and calculating and judged that our new little one would arrive around February 1, 1981. Another doctor, in that practice, assured us that the due date would be in December, since I could not possibly have felt movement that early.

Matthew, our precious second son, arrived on February 15, 1981. Eighteen months, to the day, younger than Andrew.

[caption id="attachment_1074" align="aligncenter" width="479" caption="Matthew at four years old"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Matt4yrs.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1074 " title="Matt4yrs" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Matt4yrs.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="614" /></a>[/caption]

My husband and I loved our first son Andrew so much that, before he was born, I worried about our second child. How on earth could we possibly love a second child as much as we loved Andrew?  Then Matthew was born and we discovered that we could indeed love him, every bit as much as we loved Andrew. Although our love for Matthew was unique, just as our love for Andrew was unique.

Wonderful how that precious Matthew made his way into our hearts, and our hearts just expanded to make room for him.

[caption id="attachment_1075" align="aligncenter" width="479" caption="Matthew at 6 years"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Matt6yrs.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1075 " title="Matt6yrs" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Matt6yrs.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="689" /></a>[/caption]

Amazing how Matthew was so completely different from Andrew!  Such a calm, cuddly baby. When he cried, his cry was so soft, I was concerned that I would not respond quickly enough.

His hair was also red, but much brighter, darker red than his brothers.  And wiry, tight curls that people loved to touch, just to see what they felt like.

[caption id="attachment_1073" align="aligncenter" width="479" caption="Matthew with his friend Tim Davis, the day he graduated from Berry College"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/MattBerrygrad.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1073 " title="MattBerrygrad" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/MattBerrygrad.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="686" /></a>[/caption]

Matthew always knew what he wanted, and was determined in his pursuit of that. He wanted to attend Berry College. He did not want to apply to any other college.  He wanted to major in physics, and never changed his major.

As a freshman, he worked in the physics lab at Berry.  He found some old telescopes in the lab, and tinkered with them until he had them working again. He talked his professors into starting up an Astronomy Club at Berry, and as the president of the Astronomy Club, he organized "Star Parties" where they set up the telescopes at the Berry Observatory and invited students to come out and see the stars.

[caption id="attachment_1071" align="aligncenter" width="479" caption="Matthew and Emily, when they were dating, on one of their mountain hikes."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/MattEmily.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1071 " title="MattEmily" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/MattEmily.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="234" /></a>[/caption]

He worked as an intern for three summers, and a semester, at NASA in Huntsville, Alabama, doing solar research. Then headed off to Darmouth College, in New Hampshire, to work on his masters degree. There he met his beautiful wife Emily.

[caption id="attachment_1070" align="aligncenter" width="232" caption="Matthew and Emily on their wedding day, July 7, 2007"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/EmilyMatthew-7-7-07.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1070" title="Emily&amp;Matthew 7-7-07" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/EmilyMatthew-7-7-07.jpg" alt="" width="232" height="234" /></a>[/caption]

&nbsp;

&nbsp;
                                    [post_title] => Matthew Shaw Lewis, Miracle Baby
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                                    [post_name] => matthew-shaw-lewis-miracle-baby
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                                    [post_modified] => 2012-03-24 13:01:07
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-02-07 15:16:00
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                                    [post_content] => How to Lower Your Workplace Stress



By RUTH MANTELL

Your workload has increased, so have your boss's expectations. But scaling back could mean losing a job.

Talk about stress.

Paul Baard, an organizational and motivational psychologist at Fordham University's graduate business school in New York, knows just how stressful a work environment can get. He has consulted with athletes in the high-stakes, high-pressure world of professional sports.

What secret has he passed along to those clients? When you are in a slump, you can still contribute by encouraging your teammates.

- Encourage teammates
- Help others
- Find meaning in your tasks; ask yourself, “Why do I do this work?” That helps your attitude change so you can put aside difficulties and compromise.
- Reduce your expectations.
- See "challenges," not "problems."  Approach work as an opportunity to learn, to take on new challenges.
- Set intermediate goals, to you can derive a sense of accomplishment, and keep pace with longer-term targets.
                                    [post_title] => Lower Work Stress
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-01-18 22:35:25
                                    [post_date_gmt] => 2012-01-19 03:35:25
                                    [post_content] => Temperatures have dipped again in Georgia, making it time for another favorite chili, White Chicken Chili, a new dish I've made only the last year or so.
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/WhiteChickChiliingredients.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1051" title="WhiteChickChiliingredients" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/WhiteChickChiliingredients.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="360" /></a></p>
White Chicken Chili

1 onion, chopped

1 green pepper, chopped

2 tablespoons olive oil

1 pound chicken diced

1 package White Chicken Chili seasoning mix

1 cup water

1 15-ounce can white beans, drained

toppings: shredded cheese, sour cream

Saute the chopped onion and green pepper in 2 tablespoons of olive oil, until onions are transparent.
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/SauteOnions.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1049" title="SauteOnions" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/SauteOnions.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="360" /></a></p>
Add the diced chicken pieces. Cook until the chicken is no longer pink.
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/CookChicken.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1048" title="CookChicken" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/CookChicken.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="360" /></a></p>
Add water and the seasoning package and stir.
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/Seasoning.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1047" title="Seasoning" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/Seasoning.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="359" /></a></p>
Add the white beans. (I used Great Northern beans, but any white bean is fine.)
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/AddBeans.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1046" title="AddBeans" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/AddBeans.jpg" alt="" width="479" height="291" /></a></p>
Serve with bread and toppings.
<p style="text-align: left;"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/whitechilimeal.jpg"><img class="aligncenter  wp-image-1050" title="whitechilimeal" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/whitechilimeal.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="394" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">In addition to the sour cream and cheese pictured, you may add cilantro, avocado, or green onions.</p>
                                    [post_title] => White Chicken Chili for a Cold Evening
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                                    [post_modified] => 2012-03-24 13:07:48
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-01-18 01:21:10
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                                    [post_content] => <div>
<h2><a title="Mommy_Brain" href="http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/health/2017234037_medical17.html" target="_blank">Medical: Baby changes the brains of parents</a></h2>
Parenthood sets in motion an array of hormonal and even structural changes in the brains of Mom and Dad.

</div>
<div>

Having a baby, so the cooing commercials say, changes everything.

While perhaps not changing everything, parenthood does set in motion an array of hormonal and even structural changes in the brains of Mom and Dad, in ways that researchers continue to try to understand.

Recent studies have made it clear that, contrary to the ditsy moments once dismissed as "mommy brain," mothers of newborns — whether or not they already have kids — tend to experience growth in key brain structures that influence motivation and maternal behavior.

In a small study, neuroscientists compared the brain images of 19 Connecticut women taken a few weeks before and several months after they gave birth. They found a small but significant increase in the amount of gray matter in several areas: the hypothalamus, which supports maternal motivation; the substantia nigra and amygdala, which process emotions and rewards; the parietal lobe, source of sensory integration; and the prefrontal cortex, which makes judgments. None of these regions otherwise grow in adults, the researchers noted in the journal Behavioral Neuroscience in October 2010.

The researchers suggest that the surge in hormones — prolactin, estrogen and oxytocin — during and after birth may make mothers' brains more susceptible to such reshaping.

Many more maternal brain studies have involved animals. One reported in October from the Hebrew University of Jerusalem showed that mouse moms undergo neural changes integrating odors and sounds from their pups, particularly in a region called the primary auditory cortex. The changes were particularly strong in mice that were nursing their pups.

Another recent review of links between changes to the maternal brain done by Chapman University psychologist Laura Glynnn suggests that the restructuring actually begins early-on in pregnancy, through not only hormones, but also physical signals such as fetal movement that raise heart rate and skin conductivity, and even the movement of fetal cells from the womb into the mother's brain.

There is no evidence yet of such direct tweaking, but "it's exciting to think about whether those cells are attracted to certain regions of the brain"that may be involved in optimizing maternal behavior, Glynn and colleague Curt Sandman wrote in the December issue of Current Directions in Pyschological Science.

So what's going on with the daddy brain? First, most guys make some hormonal adjustments, beginning with exposure to pregnancy hormones through their partners' sweat glands.

Men produce less testosterone after entering stable relationships and becoming fathers. Those who are most involved in taking care of their kids have the lowest levels, according to a report published last fall based on a long-term health survey of 600 men in the Philippines.

Another study published last fall in the Journal of Marriage and Family tracked 200 high-risk males ages 12 to 31. It found that, aside from all other factors, fatherhood made them less likely to commit crime, drink alcohol or use tobacco.

Other recent studies of animals and men have shown that exposure to infants gives males higher motivation and they become more skilled at problem solving, even when the babies are not biologically related.

Many men also experience heightened senses of sound and smell with fatherhood, and actually holding their baby particularly perks up prolactin levels and bonding behaviors.

<em>(Reach Lee Bowman at <a href="mailto:bowmanl@shns.com">bowmanl@shns.com</a>.)</em>

</div>
                                    [post_title] => Science Behind Mommy Brain
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                                    [post_modified] => 2012-01-18 01:21:10
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-01-16 13:07:14
                                    [post_date_gmt] => 2012-01-16 18:07:14
                                    [post_content] => My sister and I have children the same ages. One day (when they were small) I called her and told her what my kids were doing to drive me nuts.

[caption id="attachment_1030" align="aligncenter" width="331" caption="Matthew and his cousin Joshua. In most of the photos of Josh as a boy, he has a bruise on his face."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/JoshMatt1983.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1030" title="JoshMatt1983" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/JoshMatt1983.jpg" alt="" width="331" height="405" /></a>[/caption]

She laughed and said, "How childish of them!" And I laughed too.

[caption id="attachment_1032" align="aligncenter" width="480" caption="Josh, Matthew, Mother, holding Jessica, Amanda, Lisette, Daddy holding Brannon, Andrew hugging Daddy, summer 1986."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/thegrandkidsJuly86.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-1032 " title="thegrandkidsJuly86" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/thegrandkidsJuly86.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="335" /></a>[/caption]

That became a joke between us.  She'd call me, all stressed-out from some crazy thing her kids had done, and I'd tell her that her children were being SO childish.

[caption id="attachment_1034" align="aligncenter" width="518" caption="Lisette, Brannon, Amanda and Jessica, Summer 1986."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/girlcousinsMexicoBeach.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-1034" title="girlcousinsMexicoBeach" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/girlcousinsMexicoBeach.jpg" alt="" width="518" height="335" /></a>[/caption]
<p style="text-align: left;">That one phrase reminded us that they were, after all, just children.
And when one of us said, "How childish!" we would both laugh.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">What a great motherhood stress reducer!</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><em>adapted from<a title="Debi’s books" href="http://motherhoodstress.com/debis-books/" target="_blank"> Stressbusters for Moms</a>.</em></p>


[caption id="attachment_68" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Published by Zondervan Publishing, endorsed by MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers)"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/stressbusters_cover.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-68" title="stressbusters cover" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/stressbusters_cover.jpg" alt="Celebrating Wonder Motherhood" width="300" height="300" /></a>[/caption]
                                    [post_title] => Children Can be SO . . . Childish!
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                                    [post_modified] => 2012-03-24 13:08:43
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                                    [post_date] => 2012-01-16 11:10:21
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                                    [post_content] => <h1>Motherhood and the Call to Holiness</h1>
<h2>How staying at home helped moms understand their vocation. Jan. 15 issue feature.</h2>
<div>
<div><a href="http://www.facebook.com/share.php?u=http://www.ncregister.com/daily-news/motherhood-and-the-call-to-holiness1" target="_blank">Share</a></div>
<div></div>
</div>
<cite>by THOMAS L. McDONALD</cite> <em>01/14/2012 Comments <a href="http://www.ncregister.com/daily-news/motherhood-and-the-call-to-holiness1/#blogComments">(1)</a></em>
<div>
<div id="article-image-1"><img title="Shutterstock" src="http://www.ncregister.com/images/sized/images/uploads/motherhooddn-255x255.jpg" alt="Shutterstock" width="255" height="255" /><cite>– Shutterstock</cite>

</div>
Recently, the Women at NBCU (a marketing firm for NBC Universal) study found that 66% of moms said they would rather be a stay-at-home parent than a working parent. Additionally, the majority of employed moms (53%) feel that, while financially they need to work, they would prefer to be stay-at-home moms.

&nbsp;

Long before she was married or even pregnant, Vicky Stone intended to be a stay-at-home mom. It didn’t work out that way. When she and her husband had their first child, her career was taking off. They had just purchased a house and couldn’t give up the income or benefits. “I think it came down to me being too young and selfish at that time,” she admits. “I couldn’t see the big picture.”

&nbsp;

By the time she was pregnant with her fourth child, she had risen to the position of assistant county administrator for Camden County, N.J. She enjoyed the work but felt the overwhelming need to be at home with her children. “Working was coming at the cost of spending time with my family. I needed to re-evaluate my priorities.”

&nbsp;

So she left the workforce and never looked back. Now, with seven children, ranging in age from 5 to 16, she knows she made the right choice. She discerned motherhood as her vocation and learned the unique way it sanctifies everyday life.

&nbsp;

“God calls each and every one of us to holiness, but being a mother is a special blessing. Being a mother one is able to be his instrument in creation, his hands, as we help our children in all they do,” she says. “We demonstrate his love in our unconditional love for our children — and all of this carries through to not only our own children, but to all.”

&nbsp;

Other Catholic women have faced similar challenges and discernment.

&nbsp;

When Michelle Reitemeyer was working as a civil engineer, she believed she could balance both a large family and a demanding career. Married at 24, she had her first child at 27. She wanted to stay home, but, like many families, they simply couldn’t afford to lose the extra paycheck: “The reality was that we owed a ton of money from our private college education, and we hadn’t been overly prudent in how we spent our spare cash in our early marriage. I managed to keep my paycheck, but finagled fewer hours in the office and two days working from home.”

&nbsp;

This approach didn’t work out too well, and a month before the birth of her second son, she made the decision to stop working and turn to motherhood full time. “Often, a woman works just to pay for childcare, and it makes no sense,” she explains. “Not in my case. Had I poured myself into my career, I could have made a lot of money. I was on an upward path, especially once my company added a commission to my base pay a few months before I quit. But, enticing as that was, I am an old-fashioned girl. I had dreams of waving goodbye to the kids as they left for school, spending my day cleaning the house and baking cookies, greeting them with smiles when they got home, and just having this perfect <em>Leave It to Beaver</em> life. I didn’t want other people to change my babies’ diapers, feed my babies bottles, or help my children with their homework.”

&nbsp;

Mother of six Margaret Berns, on the other hand, always knew she would stay home to raise her family. “In fact,” she says, “I told my husband so on our first date. (The fact that he stuck around for a second date was very encouraging.) This is it for me: Raising my children is the most important thing I will do.” She left her job as a teacher in a small Catholic high school upon the birth of her first child.

&nbsp;

Heather Price was also working as a teacher when she decided to leave her job to stay at home. Teaching is “probably one of the most family-friendly careers there is,” she says. “I loved it until I was a mother — then the joy paled to nonexistence. I decided to focus on my family when it hurt so much to drop my oldest off at her aunt’s so I could go to work. It seemed hypocritical to be teaching other people’s children and leave someone else to take care of my own. Then No. 2 was born when No. 1 was only a year and a half old, and the work to get out the door was just overwhelming. Between prepared-food costs, gas costs and day-care costs, I wasn’t making any money.”

&nbsp;

Now Price is pregnant with her sixth child, and she and her husband are committed to “the spirit of sacrifice. I would love to make annual trips to France or even take graduate-level classes in art history or French; even a solitary trip to the grocery store, however, is a luxury. Sometimes I feel like I live in a cloister, with my only influence being through prayer, but I don’t know that I’m comfortable with that comparison. Those courageous women have made far greater sacrifices than I.”

&nbsp;

For Berns, the call to holiness comes from “the love that I show my children and husband. Theoretically, this love will increase exponentially when my children leave the house — the ripples will expand; the faith will be shared. That is my great hope: that my children will all be emissaries of the King and will be inspired, not hindered, by what they’ve learned in our home.”

&nbsp;

Some new mothers, however, find the image of the vocation doesn’t always match the reality. How can children be the means for a mother’s sanctification if they only make her irritable, tense and exhausted? Reitemeyer learned gradually that things do get better with age and experience.

&nbsp;

“There were many evenings I wept while nursing a little one to sleep,” she admits, “and prayed to Mother Mary for the grace to be gentle and patient and kind. I still have a long way to go, but, certainly, I find it much easier now to speak softly or slow down to a child’s pace or laugh before scolding. Motherhood, well done, has no room for selfishness, impatience, sloth or cowardice. Every day brings new challenges that require exercising one or more virtues, and to boldly face another day is to get a bit stronger, better, holier. Certainly, there is the possibility of failure, of becoming apathetic, of remaining selfish and self-centered. And, surely, as the mother goes, so too will go the family, and thus the world.

&nbsp;

“Holy women will tend to raise holy families, and since the family is the fundamental unit of society, the more holy families there are, the better our society will be.”

&nbsp;

For Stone, the call to holiness in her vocation reflects the call of God to mankind. “When we become filled with his love,” she says, “we see others as his children. And just as we want to help our children attain their full potential, you can see how God wants all of his children to attain heaven. We feel the call to help others, as we should, on our path to walk alongside us as we strive to be more pleasing to him.”

&nbsp;
<p align="right"><em>Thomas L. McDonald is a catechist in the Diocese of Trenton, New Jersey.</em></p>

</div>
Read more: <a href="http://www.ncregister.com/daily-news/motherhood-and-the-call-to-holiness1/#ixzz1jdbMa400">http://www.ncregister.com/daily-news/motherhood-and-the-call-to-holiness1/#ixzz1jdbMa400</a>
                                    [post_title] => Motherhood and Call to Holiness
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                                    [post_content] => Before my first child was born, I was concerned that I would never wake up if he cried in the night.  I was SUCH a sound sleeper BC (before children).  But I needn't have worried. As soon as Andrew was born, I discovered I had developed a "mommy brain."

[caption id="attachment_448" align="aligncenter" width="325" caption="Andrew as a newborn"]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/AndrewNewborn.jpg"><img class=" wp-image-448  " title="AndrewNewborn" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/AndrewNewborn-663x1024.jpg" alt="" width="325" height="501" /></a>[/caption]

You mothers out there know what "mommy brain" is: that condition where you become mentally fuzzy on details you thought you'd never forget, while at the same time you develop an uncanny ability to hear your baby's cry and know whether he is hungry, tired, sick, bored, in pain or just wants his mommy.

<a title="prenatal_origins_ of_infant_maternal_bonding" href="http://cdp.sagepub.com/content/20/6/384.abstract" target="_blank">A review of new research</a> suggests that "prenatal hormone exposures are critical for priming the maternal brain for the challenges of motherhood and have implications for the mother’s brain structure and function that may last the rest of her lifetime."  And<a title="pregnancy_and_mommy_brain" href="http://www.newsucanuse.org/pregnancy-and-mommy-brain/" target="_blank"> mommy brain probably explains </a>why new mothers wake up when their babies merely whimper in their sleep.

[caption id="attachment_214" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Lisette, age 3, with Debi, doing some mother-daughter bonding."]<a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/LisetteDebiPorchswing.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-214" title="Debi with Lisette" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/LisetteDebiPorchswing-300x219.jpg" alt="Debi with Lisette" width="300" height="219" /></a>[/caption]

During pregnancy, a mom  is exposed to a massive hormonal shift, that according to this research, readies her brain for the challenges of motherhood, "helping her becomes less rattled by stress and more attuned to her baby’s needs."
<div class="mceTemp mceIEcenter" style="text-align: left;"><dl id="attachment_453" class="wp-caption aligncenter" style="width: 310px;"><dt class="wp-caption-dt"><a href="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/LisetteNewbornFeatured.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-453" title="LisetteNewbornFeatured" src="http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/LisetteNewbornFeatured-300x160.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="160" /></a></dt><dd class="wp-caption-dd">Debi and Lisette on the day she was born. That's Andrew nose-to-nose with his new sister and Matthew peering over his shoulder.</dd></dl></div>
<div class="mceTemp mceIEcenter" style="text-align: left;">So, in the same way that a mother, and how she takes care of herself during pregnancy, impacts the baby, the fetus affects the mom. When a baby moves in utero, even if the mother cannot feel the movement, the mother's heart rate rises and her skin conductance response is aroused - the phenomenon when skin momentarily becomes a better conductor of electricity, indicating an emotional response.</div>
<div class="mceTemp mceIEcenter" style="text-align: left;"></div>
<div class="mceTemp mceIEcenter" style="text-align: left;">How amazing! From the very beginning of life, mothers and their babies are fearfully and wonderfully - an intricately - made.</div>
                                    [post_title] => New Evidence Confirms Mommy Brain
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                                    [post_content] => <a href="http://www.gmanetwork.com/news/story/240351/opinion/blogs/parenting-changes-one-s-perspective">Parenting changes one's perspective</a> Richelle Sy-Kho December 14, 2011 1:33pm 14 Email2 762 ShareThis779 If someone had asked me 10 years ago what I would be in 10 years' time, my answer would’ve been a no-brainer. You see, I had just finished a three-month long course on International Broadcast Journalism with the Thomson Foundation at Cardiff University in Wales, after a one-month internship training with CNN in Atlanta in 1999, and I was on a journalistic high. At 27 years old, my career was the only thing in my mind. So I would have said that I’d be a famous and award-winning TV anchor and reporter, with my own show. Or, I’d be working as an anchor and/or reporter for an international media organization like CNN or BBC.

Oh, and I’d have a masters and a doctorate degree tucked under my belt at the same time. The thought of having a family, or being a mother, didn’t even figure at all in the equation. That’s why it’s still hard to believe that I’m now a full-time wife to my husband Aldrich, and mother of three young kids, living a quiet and stress-free life away from the limelight. (At least it was quiet and stress free when I was in Iloilo the last seven years.) Quite a long way off from the dreams I had 10 years ago. But don’t get me wrong. I love my life now. Being a full-time yaya, driver, tutor, cook, mother and wife may not be what I envisioned, but I wouldn’t exchange it for the world. When I got married in 2004, I decided to quit my job as a reporter with GMA-7 to settle down and raise a family. I wanted to have time for my kids, to see them grow and be with them every step of the way. I figured I’d only be able to do that if I stay home full-time and be a hands-on mother. I had seen a lot of my colleagues struggle to balance work and motherhood, often missing milestones in their children’s lives because they were out covering a story and doing their job. I decided I wasn’t cut out for that kind of life. The Lord didn’t bless me with a child immediately after my wedding in July 2004. There came a point where I questioned my decision to stop working. After all, I had no children to show for it. It was just me and my husband. It didn’t help that I was stuck in the middle of Iloilo City, with nothing to do but be a bum. I started entertaining thoughts of going back to work and being useful again. Suddenly, just before our first wedding anniversary, I got pregnant, and all thoughts of work went out the window. I was sooo happy. Finally, my wish was granted. I took all the necessary precautions, ate mostly healthy food, and read to my baby even in the womb. I couldn’t wait to be a mother. In February 2006 I gave birth to my firstborn, a baby girl. I named her Raine Alexis. Raine was barely a year and a half years old when I gave birth to my second child, a boy named Aidan Riley, in August 2007. And in July 2009, I became a mom for the third time with the birth of my baby boy Aaron Russel. Being a mom... I’ve always loved Freddie Aguilar’s song “Anak”. But it took on a whole new meaning when I had children. The first time I held Raine in my arms was pure bliss! I couldn’t believe my husband and I were capable of producing such a perfect creature. I was content just to stare at her the whole time, even while she was sleeping. I’d smell her breath, breathe in her scent like Edward breathes Bella’s, and generally smile at her like I had gone crazy. But all that warm fuzzy feeling toward my baby immediately disappeared during times when she’d cry for no reason at all. I was grumpy and tired from nursing and lack of sleep, and here was this abnormally loud creature who wouldn’t give me even a moment of peace and quiet. I was almost ready to throw her out the window. Good thing my husband was there to stop me by getting Raine and letting me cry out my frustration and baby blues away. When Aidan came along, things got worse. I had to take care of an eternally-hungry infant and an energetic toddler. I had to make sure I gave equal love and attention to both. Sure I had yayas, but they were there mostly to assist. I was still the primary caregiver, and the one who slept with them at night. So I often ended up nursing Aidan in one arm, while putting Raine to sleep using the other arm. Talk about multitasking! With Aaron now, things have settled down quite a bit. No more baby blues. I’ve gotten used to getting up several times at night, for feedings and to check on the children. Raine and Aidan are a bit older and have each other as playmates so they don’t bug me that much. Besides, that’s what Papa is there for, to take pesky kids out of Mama’s hands. Good thing my husband is more than up to the task of reining in their “kakulitan.” … is the best thing in the world But despite the occasional complaints I have about the headaches my kids give me, I can’t imagine life without them. I don’t think I can go back to work full-time anymore. I’ve gotten so used to being with my children the whole day that I’ll miss not being with them. The thrill of being looked upon with adoring eyes by my kids, of seeing them grow up and achieving important milestones in their lives … these are priceless. And having three kids doesn’t seem to lessen the excitement I have in being a mother. It helps that all three of them have their own personality and special ways of sucking up to me. As the firstborn, Raine is, and will always be, extra special to me. She’s my mini-me, in terms of looks and katarayan. She’s very perceptive, is naturally curious and is forever asking questions. I usually run out of answers to give her. She’s also sensitive and caring, and easily empathizes with people around her. As an ate, she’s bossy and very protective of her younger brothers, and usually acts as their self-proclaimed yaya. Aidan, my second child, is such an imp. He may be innocent-looking but is actually full of mischief, as most little boys usually are. Mayhem follows him everywhere he goes. At more four years of age, Aidan is still prone to tantrums whenever he doesn’t get his own way. But he’s very cheerful and affectionate, always ready to give me a kiss and a hug. He also politely greets people by touching their hand to his forehead as a sign of respect. Of my three children, Aaron seemed to be the easiest baby and more good-natured than his older siblings. He didn’t cry that much, and generally just ate and slept. But now at two years of age, he’s the most masungit, and prone to throwing temper trantrums, or even doing his own version of planking, when he doesn’t get his own way. Aaron may be the most innocent-looking, but he’s the naughtiest of the three. It’s true what they say that once you become a parent, your whole outlook shifts. Whereas before, I thought only of myself, now my children come first. I made it a point to breastfeed all three of my children to give them the best nutrition, eating boiled malunggay leaves every day to increase my milk supply and bearing with all the soreness and pain that came with nursing. I read up on parenting articles in magazines and on the net to find out how to raise my children better. I buy mostly books and educational toys to further hone their skills and to make them smart kids. And when they smile and look at me with such need and adoration and love, I feel like I’m the most important person in the world. But at the end of the day, I’ve realized that what’s important is not what our children manage to achieve, but who they are and how they turn out. My husband and I try to teach them the right values, to care for others and to learn to strive for what they want. However, I think the best thing I can do for my children is to introduce them to Jesus, and to raise them to be individuals who love and serve God above all. For I believe each child of mine is a treasure from the Lord. He gave them to me for safekeeping that’s why I should do my best to cherish and take care of these precious ones.
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<a class='last-page' title='Go to the last page' href='http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-admin/edit.php?paged=4'>&raquo;</a></span></div>
                    [is_trash] => 
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                                    [title] => Title
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                                    [comments] => <span class="vers"><div title="Comments" class="comment-grey-bubble"></div></span>
                                    [date] => Date
                                    [al2fb] => Facebook
                                    [seotitle] => SEO Title
                                    [seokeywords] => SEO Keywords
                                    [seodesc] => SEO Description
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            [function] => display_rows_or_placeholder
            [class] => WP_List_Table
            [type] => ->
            [object] => WP_Posts_List_Table Object
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                            [screen] => WP_Screen Object
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                                    [id] => edit-post
                                    [in_admin:protected] => site
                                    [is_network] => 
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                                    [parent_file] => edit.php
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                                    [_help_tabs:private] => Array
                                        (
                                            [overview] => Array
                                                (
                                                    [title] => Overview
                                                    [id] => overview
                                                    [content] => <p>This screen provides access to all of your posts. You can customize the display of this screen to suit your workflow.</p>
                                                    [callback] => 
                                                )

                                            [screen-content] => Array
                                                (
                                                    [title] => Screen Content
                                                    [id] => screen-content
                                                    [content] => <p>You can customize the display of this screen&#8217;s contents in a number of ways:</p><ul><li>You can hide/display columns based on your needs and decide how many posts to list per screen using the Screen Options tab.</li><li>You can filter the list of posts by post status using the text links in the upper left to show All, Published, Draft, or Trashed posts. The default view is to show all posts.</li><li>You can view posts in a simple title list or with an excerpt. Choose the view you prefer by clicking on the icons at the top of the list on the right.</li><li>You can refine the list to show only posts in a specific category or from a specific month by using the dropdown menus above the posts list. Click the Filter button after making your selection. You also can refine the list by clicking on the post author, category or tag in the posts list.</li></ul>
                                                    [callback] => 
                                                )

                                            [action-links] => Array
                                                (
                                                    [title] => Available Actions
                                                    [id] => action-links
                                                    [content] => <p>Hovering over a row in the posts list will display action links that allow you to manage your post. You can perform the following actions:</p><ul><li><strong>Edit</strong> takes you to the editing screen for that post. You can also reach that screen by clicking on the post title.</li><li><strong>Quick Edit</strong> provides inline access to the metadata of your post, allowing you to update post details without leaving this screen.</li><li><strong>Trash</strong> removes your post from this list and places it in the trash, from which you can permanently delete it.</li><li><strong>Preview</strong> will show you what your draft post will look like if you publish it. View will take you to your live site to view the post. Which link is available depends on your post&#8217;s status.</li></ul>
                                                    [callback] => 
                                                )

                                            [bulk-actions] => Array
                                                (
                                                    [title] => Bulk Actions
                                                    [id] => bulk-actions
                                                    [content] => <p>You can also edit or move multiple posts to the trash at once. Select the posts you want to act on using the checkboxes, then select the action you want to take from the Bulk Actions menu and click Apply.</p><p>When using Bulk Edit, you can change the metadata (categories, author, etc.) for all selected posts at once. To remove a post from the grouping, just click the x next to its name in the Bulk Edit area that appears.</p>
                                                    [callback] => 
                                                )

                                        )

                                    [_help_sidebar:private] => <p><strong>For more information:</strong></p><p><a href="http://codex.wordpress.org/Posts_Screen" target="_blank">Documentation on Managing Posts</a></p><p><a href="http://wordpress.org/support/" target="_blank">Support Forums</a></p>
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                                                    [option] => edit_post_per_page
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                                    [_show_screen_options:private] => 1
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                    [screen] => WP_Screen Object
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                            [id] => edit-post
                            [in_admin:protected] => site
                            [is_network] => 
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                            [parent_base] => edit
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                            [_help_tabs:private] => Array
                                (
                                    [overview] => Array
                                        (
                                            [title] => Overview
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                                            [content] => <p>This screen provides access to all of your posts. You can customize the display of this screen to suit your workflow.</p>
                                            [callback] => 
                                        )

                                    [screen-content] => Array
                                        (
                                            [title] => Screen Content
                                            [id] => screen-content
                                            [content] => <p>You can customize the display of this screen&#8217;s contents in a number of ways:</p><ul><li>You can hide/display columns based on your needs and decide how many posts to list per screen using the Screen Options tab.</li><li>You can filter the list of posts by post status using the text links in the upper left to show All, Published, Draft, or Trashed posts. The default view is to show all posts.</li><li>You can view posts in a simple title list or with an excerpt. Choose the view you prefer by clicking on the icons at the top of the list on the right.</li><li>You can refine the list to show only posts in a specific category or from a specific month by using the dropdown menus above the posts list. Click the Filter button after making your selection. You also can refine the list by clicking on the post author, category or tag in the posts list.</li></ul>
                                            [callback] => 
                                        )

                                    [action-links] => Array
                                        (
                                            [title] => Available Actions
                                            [id] => action-links
                                            [content] => <p>Hovering over a row in the posts list will display action links that allow you to manage your post. You can perform the following actions:</p><ul><li><strong>Edit</strong> takes you to the editing screen for that post. You can also reach that screen by clicking on the post title.</li><li><strong>Quick Edit</strong> provides inline access to the metadata of your post, allowing you to update post details without leaving this screen.</li><li><strong>Trash</strong> removes your post from this list and places it in the trash, from which you can permanently delete it.</li><li><strong>Preview</strong> will show you what your draft post will look like if you publish it. View will take you to your live site to view the post. Which link is available depends on your post&#8217;s status.</li></ul>
                                            [callback] => 
                                        )

                                    [bulk-actions] => Array
                                        (
                                            [title] => Bulk Actions
                                            [id] => bulk-actions
                                            [content] => <p>You can also edit or move multiple posts to the trash at once. Select the posts you want to act on using the checkboxes, then select the action you want to take from the Bulk Actions menu and click Apply.</p><p>When using Bulk Edit, you can change the metadata (categories, author, etc.) for all selected posts at once. To remove a post from the grouping, just click the x next to its name in the Bulk Edit area that appears.</p>
                                            [callback] => 
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                                )

                            [_help_sidebar:private] => <p><strong>For more information:</strong></p><p><a href="http://codex.wordpress.org/Posts_Screen" target="_blank">Documentation on Managing Posts</a></p><p><a href="http://wordpress.org/support/" target="_blank">Support Forums</a></p>
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<span class='pagination-links'><a class='first-page disabled' title='Go to the first page' href='http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-admin/edit.php'>&laquo;</a>
<a class='prev-page disabled' title='Go to the previous page' href='http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-admin/edit.php?paged=1'>&lsaquo;</a>
<span class="paging-input"><input class='current-page' title='Current page' type='text' name='paged' value='1' size='1' /> of <span class='total-pages'>4</span></span>
<a class='next-page' title='Go to the next page' href='http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-admin/edit.php?paged=2'>&rsaquo;</a>
<a class='last-page' title='Go to the last page' href='http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-admin/edit.php?paged=4'>&raquo;</a></span></div>
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                        (
                            [0] => Array
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                                    [title] => Title
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                                    [tags] => Tags
                                    [comments] => <span class="vers"><div title="Comments" class="comment-grey-bubble"></div></span>
                                    [date] => Date
                                    [al2fb] => Facebook
                                    [seotitle] => SEO Title
                                    [seokeywords] => SEO Keywords
                                    [seodesc] => SEO Description
                                )

                            [1] => Array
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                            [2] => Array
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            [args] => Array
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            [file] => /home/bluestak/public_html/motherhoodstress.com/wp-admin/edit.php
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            [type] => ->
            [object] => WP_Posts_List_Table Object
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                                    [_help_tabs:private] => Array
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                                                    [callback] => 
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                                            [screen-content] => Array
                                                (
                                                    [title] => Screen Content
                                                    [id] => screen-content
                                                    [content] => <p>You can customize the display of this screen&#8217;s contents in a number of ways:</p><ul><li>You can hide/display columns based on your needs and decide how many posts to list per screen using the Screen Options tab.</li><li>You can filter the list of posts by post status using the text links in the upper left to show All, Published, Draft, or Trashed posts. The default view is to show all posts.</li><li>You can view posts in a simple title list or with an excerpt. Choose the view you prefer by clicking on the icons at the top of the list on the right.</li><li>You can refine the list to show only posts in a specific category or from a specific month by using the dropdown menus above the posts list. Click the Filter button after making your selection. You also can refine the list by clicking on the post author, category or tag in the posts list.</li></ul>
                                                    [callback] => 
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                                            [action-links] => Array
                                                (
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                                                    [callback] => 
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                                            [bulk-actions] => Array
                                                (
                                                    [title] => Bulk Actions
                                                    [id] => bulk-actions
                                                    [content] => <p>You can also edit or move multiple posts to the trash at once. Select the posts you want to act on using the checkboxes, then select the action you want to take from the Bulk Actions menu and click Apply.</p><p>When using Bulk Edit, you can change the metadata (categories, author, etc.) for all selected posts at once. To remove a post from the grouping, just click the x next to its name in the Bulk Edit area that appears.</p>
                                                    [callback] => 
                                                )

                                        )

                                    [_help_sidebar:private] => <p><strong>For more information:</strong></p><p><a href="http://codex.wordpress.org/Posts_Screen" target="_blank">Documentation on Managing Posts</a></p><p><a href="http://wordpress.org/support/" target="_blank">Support Forums</a></p>
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                    [screen] => WP_Screen Object
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                            [id] => edit-post
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                            [is_network] => 
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                                            [content] => <p>This screen provides access to all of your posts. You can customize the display of this screen to suit your workflow.</p>
                                            [callback] => 
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                                    [screen-content] => Array
                                        (
                                            [title] => Screen Content
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                                            [content] => <p>You can customize the display of this screen&#8217;s contents in a number of ways:</p><ul><li>You can hide/display columns based on your needs and decide how many posts to list per screen using the Screen Options tab.</li><li>You can filter the list of posts by post status using the text links in the upper left to show All, Published, Draft, or Trashed posts. The default view is to show all posts.</li><li>You can view posts in a simple title list or with an excerpt. Choose the view you prefer by clicking on the icons at the top of the list on the right.</li><li>You can refine the list to show only posts in a specific category or from a specific month by using the dropdown menus above the posts list. Click the Filter button after making your selection. You also can refine the list by clicking on the post author, category or tag in the posts list.</li></ul>
                                            [callback] => 
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                                    [action-links] => Array
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                                            [content] => <p>Hovering over a row in the posts list will display action links that allow you to manage your post. You can perform the following actions:</p><ul><li><strong>Edit</strong> takes you to the editing screen for that post. You can also reach that screen by clicking on the post title.</li><li><strong>Quick Edit</strong> provides inline access to the metadata of your post, allowing you to update post details without leaving this screen.</li><li><strong>Trash</strong> removes your post from this list and places it in the trash, from which you can permanently delete it.</li><li><strong>Preview</strong> will show you what your draft post will look like if you publish it. View will take you to your live site to view the post. Which link is available depends on your post&#8217;s status.</li></ul>
                                            [callback] => 
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                                    [bulk-actions] => Array
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                                            [content] => <p>You can also edit or move multiple posts to the trash at once. Select the posts you want to act on using the checkboxes, then select the action you want to take from the Bulk Actions menu and click Apply.</p><p>When using Bulk Edit, you can change the metadata (categories, author, etc.) for all selected posts at once. To remove a post from the grouping, just click the x next to its name in the Bulk Edit area that appears.</p>
                                            [callback] => 
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                                )

                            [_help_sidebar:private] => <p><strong>For more information:</strong></p><p><a href="http://codex.wordpress.org/Posts_Screen" target="_blank">Documentation on Managing Posts</a></p><p><a href="http://wordpress.org/support/" target="_blank">Support Forums</a></p>
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                    [_pagination] => <div class='tablenav-pages'><span class="displaying-num">79 items</span>
<span class='pagination-links'><a class='first-page disabled' title='Go to the first page' href='http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-admin/edit.php'>&laquo;</a>
<a class='prev-page disabled' title='Go to the previous page' href='http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-admin/edit.php?paged=1'>&lsaquo;</a>
<span class="paging-input"><input class='current-page' title='Current page' type='text' name='paged' value='1' size='1' /> of <span class='total-pages'>4</span></span>
<a class='next-page' title='Go to the next page' href='http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-admin/edit.php?paged=2'>&rsaquo;</a>
<a class='last-page' title='Go to the last page' href='http://motherhoodstress.com/wp-admin/edit.php?paged=4'>&raquo;</a></span></div>
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                                    [comments] => <span class="vers"><div title="Comments" class="comment-grey-bubble"></div></span>
                                    [date] => Date
                                    [al2fb] => Facebook
                                    [seotitle] => SEO Title
                                    [seokeywords] => SEO Keywords
                                    [seodesc] => SEO Description
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