Laws Of The Wild (I've Learned The Hard Way)
Alaska Grizzly
Denali National Park
August 1993
Distance: 75 yards
When a bull Buffalo in Yellowstone National Park decides that he does not want to have his picture taken, all efforts at photography should cease immediately.
Being lost on the Paris subway system provides quite an incentive to learn the French language.
When your life depends on it, sometimes a 3-season tent will stand up to a full blown blizzard.
Black bears with cubs in the Smokies don't like to share their blackberries with hikers.
Grizzlies in Alaska don't like to share their blackberries with hikers, either.
When you have no other choice, you can hike quite a distance with a broken bone in your foot.
When selecting a campsite in the Arctic, don't pitch a tent in a green, mossy area. It's green and mossy because that's where water stands after a good, hard rain.
Its almost impossible to burn up a wet tent, but you can scorch the heck out of one.
Backpacking stoves are actually calculating, patient psychopaths, silently plotting the painful demise of their owners.
Elk dearly love to urinate on unattended sleeping bags.
If there is a heaven for backpackers, it probably looks a lot like Denali National Park in Alaska.
Mountain goats feel that they have the right-of-way on trails that traverse their territory, regardless of how precipitous the terrain. Arguing this point can be hazardous to your health.
Lying awake all night in a tent listening to avalanches in the Italian Alps while reading a Stephen King novel by candlelight can give you nightmares later on.
As far as I can tell, there are no zip-lock bags, Coleman fuel or salad bars anywhere in Europe.
Calling a rude rest room attendant a bad name is not a good way to gain admittance to a pay toilet in France.
When a Customs official in London asks if you know where you are, expect to have your baggage searched.
I can get by alone in a country where the language is different, providing the alphabet is the same as ours. However, if both the language and the alphabet are different, I wouldn't try it.
A sharp $40 Buck knife can provide quite an attitude adjustment for a tight pair of $30 hiking boots.
Don't ever look directly into a geyser, regardless of how calm and well behaved it seems at the moment.
We sit as many risks as we run. The weakest among us can be some kind of athlete, but only the strongest can survive as spectators.